Bloody tears

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: the Twilight world and characters are owned by the brilliant Stephanie Meyers. I'm just playing around with their story and life's a bit.

Edward POV

          Sitting on the rocking chair in the corner of Bella's bedroom, I gazed out the window, deep in thought. The birthday party that my family and I threw for her was... a complete disaster. After bringing Bella home, I couldn't look at her for the shame I felt coursing through my body. She got a paper cut for goodness sake! It seems like nothing, but the smell of her blood, oh, goodness. My bloodlust was so strong; everyone's bloodlust was strong.
         I was about to turn around and suck out every drop out of her body, craving the feeling of her blood rushing down my throat and tasting the copper of it on my tongue. Then Jasper, acting on the bloodlust of every vampire in the room, mostly mine, crouched low to the ground, ready to spring toward her. Out of defense, for she was MINE, I threw Bella backward with my arm as growls exploded through my mouth. Emmett and Carlisle grabbed Jasper, holding him back. I stopped breathing, and the smell cut off, my brain beginning to clear.
          Carlisle then took charge, making the others take Jasper out so he can hunt, and so he could fix Bella's arm. There was a big gash in her right, upper forearm with glass coating it from where I had thrown her into the vases. When she was all done getting stitched up and changed into a different blouse, I took her home. She asked me to stay, and I gave in to her request. After she opened her presents and had lied down for bed, she turned and began to kiss me. I was... out of control. I didn't mean to, but we made love. I didn't seem to hurt her, or at least she made it seem that way, but... something was different now; I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but it's almost as if the pull I had to her was gone. It wasn't painful, it was just gone.
          When I looked at her I felt... nothing. I thought back to how I felt before tonight, what I thought was love. What if it wasn't, though? What if it was a form of lust? The lust for her blood, then the lust to know what was going on inside her strangely, silent mind, and, finally, the lust for her body. Now, I had satisfied the lust for all three, and I felt nothing for her.
          I had tasted her blood after James had bitten her; I had not heard her thoughts but I could read her face almost as well; and then I had her body just moments ago. My thought drifted to my family; they had grown to love her. But I couldn't see myself continuing to be with her when I felt nothing in return.
          I had to find a way to leave, a way to get everyone to leave. I began to feel confined in Forks, almost stir crazy. I didn't want anything to do with the girl laying in the bed across the room. Then, my mind gave me the perfect idea. They would leave if I told them that Bella left ME; they wouldn't want me to suffer here, knowing I would have to face her on a daily basis. They would think my heart wouldn't be able to take the sight of her, living happily without me, while I wallow in my heartbreak.
          With the plan clear in my mind, I jumped out the window, not bothering to close it behind me. I raced off to my house, feeling like a weight has been taken off of my shoulders. I would no longer have to pretend to desire for the human, and the secret I now hold within me will never be revealed to my family.

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          With the great acting skills I have conjured over the years, I convinced every one of my family members that Bella left me for putting her in danger... again. I explained how she couldn't be with me when she constantly feared for her life. Jasper took it the hardest, and after hearing that, he ran out of the house. His thoughts ran through his guilt that he felt for attacking her, and I held in the smirk that was demanding its place on my face.
          Pathetic.
          Well, I was not pathetic anymore, and I would never be again. I 'begged' them if we could leave town, anywhere but here. Alice had wanted to go and see Bella, wanting to reason with her, wanting to at least say goodbye. But I said that she didn't want to see any of us, and, then to beat that damn horse dead, I handed Esme back the plane tickets she gave to Bella as a present. I snatched them before leaving, and told Esme Bella said to give these back and that she was sorry.
          I had then excused myself to my room so I could cry, sulk, and wallow in my own pity in peace. Quickly, I packed my bags and then jumped from my window, running around to the garage to place everything into the trunk of my Volvo. While everyone was running around and packing as I did, I ran back to Bella's, seeing that it was early enough that she would be awake and about to head out to school.
          When I get to her house, Charlie is already gone, so I walked to the front door and knocked. After a few seconds, she comes to the door, looking surprised.
          "Edward, what's going on? It's almost time for school," she asked, confused.
          "Bella, we need to talk. Will you come to walk with me?" I asked without answering her question.
          "Okay, sure," she mutters, walking out of the house and closing the door behind her self.
          She goes to hold my hand, so I hold my arm out for her to latch onto instead. We walk forward, deeper into the forest another 30 seconds, walking with a clear view of the house and street. Finally, I call out her name, making her stop.
          "Bella?" She quickly turned around, questions brimming in her eyes.
          "We are leaving." Before she could interrupt, I held out a hand to stop her. "We as in me and my family. We have been here too long and it's time for us to move on." I could see she was about to argue so I continued without compassion. "You don't belong in my world, Bella."
          Quickly, she responded, "I belong with you," in a choked voice.
          I sigh, tired of this game, and I drove it home. "I'm done with you; you're just not good enough for me anymore. It was cruel to lead you on, so you won't have to worry. We will not interfere with your life again. It will be as if we ever met you; it will be as it should've been from the beginning. Goodbye, Bella, forever." With that, I ran back to my house, never wanting to see that stupid look plastered across her face.