Pretty Thoughts

Incarceration

Existence is our prison.

I've always had this feeling.

A burning curiosity that forces me to wonder what the point of our existence is.

I am told that it is to gain knowledge.

Though, I am confident that I have acquired enough knowledge in this life.

I long to explorer what comes after it all.

My curiosity has a thirst for the dangerous and taboo.

I have died before.

Though I try my hardest, I may not remember how I met my demise nor the place I was sent to afterward.

Yet I am certain that I have perished in the past.

It is as if something forbids me from unlocking that memory.

I think the chains that bind me to this corps I lug around to interact with this world is responsible for my amnesia.

I have been cuffed to this cadaver like an animal.

The chains force me to live again.

I've thought about ending it all.

Yet, another nagging feeling comes with the consideration of death.

At this point I know I have been punished and banished to live out my sentence in this world.

It is a purgatory.

A prison.

If I try death again all that will follow is rebirth.

I will simply be sent back to start over and live out my sentence once again.

I am trapped.

Constantly planning my escape.

Imprisoned.

Stuck fearing my natural death for it will only force me to face the judge and jury once again.

I dread the possibility of being sentenced to start this existence yet again.

I have become a rogue.

Unwilling to conform to even the heaves systems, no matter how much they promise it is better.

It is still not true freedom.

They punish me to keep me in check.

In hopes of molding me or breaking me to force me to conform.

To be at 'peace'.

But I will never follow their rules.

I'd rather die a thousand deaths!