Hiding The Truth

Chapter 25

SHERLOCK'S POV

I had another two nightmares after I fell asleep. Greg lay with me, soothed me and calmed me, stopped me crying. I felt safe and loved in his arms. Not that he knew I felt that way.

When morning came he offered me breakfast. I tried to reject and we settled on a fruit smoothie with strawberry and banana. I didn't drink it, pouring it down the sink when it was my turn to change and he called Donovan to collect us. Once I was discharged, I thanked the nurse and she handed me all my clothes and Greg's clothes. "I got them cleaned by a professional. No need to pay. My gift. Take it easy, Mr Holmes. Mr Lestrade. " she said, smiling. I put on my coat and we walked out of the hospital to Sally waiting for us at the car. "You feeling better, Freak?" she asked. Greg scowled. "Don't call him that, Donovan, he is gifted not a freak." She looked at the pair and shrugged. "You drive, Sally. To the park near my place please." he said, opening the door for me and closing it then getting in the other side.
The drive was quiet but not uncomfortable. Physically, yes but not in the other sense. I decided I would give myself a shot of morphine when I got home. I needed it.

We got out at the park and Sally drove off, leaving us to walk around the lake a couple of times, taking in the fresh air. "Thank you for all of this. It means a lot to me, Gregory. More than you know." I told him. I saw him smile before he said "Your welcome." and we walked in a comfortable silence.

He walked me home and I was tempted to hug him but instead, I reached my hand out and shook his, smiled and entered the building.

John was very happy to see me, gave me a warm hug and grinned at me from ear to ear. "Want lunch?" he offered while I hung my coat up. "Just had a sandwich and crisps, thanks." I lied. "Nice, what flavour?" he asked casually.
"Cheese and tomato with prawn cocktail crisps." I answered a little too quickly. I hope he didn't notice.
"Sounds tasty. You feeling better then?" he asked me with a smile on his face, sitting down with a cup of tea and a couple of digestive biscuits. I nodded. "Yes, just tired to be honest. You wouldn't mind if I go and have a rest would you?" I asked, yawning. I wasn't lying when I said I was tired.
Physically and emotionally.
"Not at all, mate." so I retired to my room and got out my needle. I used the syringe and filled it to precisely the desired amount, lifting up my left sleeve, marvelling at my now healing wounds. They were beautiful. Too beautiful to cover up.
Putting on my tourniquet, I injected the cool fluid into my blood stream and relaxed. I pulled out a little wooden box from underneath my chest of drawers and opened it up. Inside were my three scalpels, my razor blade and a pen knife, along with six large melonin pads, medical tape and bandages. I ran my fingers over them all, selecting a brand new scalpel, unwrapping it and  leaned up against my bed. I didn't hesitate to place my white blood rag underneath and lift it to my right arm slashing it across my wrist. It was so much deeper than the other ones, bleeding scarlet. More and more cuts joined the first until exactly twenty eight, deep and closely situated cuts sat upon my forearm. More of them and worse than last time. It felt good to let my pain out. Although, next time I won't use the morphine first. I wanted pain so why drug myself up on pain medication? Stupid mistake. I sighed, deciding against passing out, so I wiped off the blood and put pressure on the cuts for a few minutes then worked as fast as possible to get the dressing on before the blood started flowing freely again.
This time I had no mess on the floor, so I replaced the items in their rightful places, taking care to wipe the blade and got myself onto my bed and lay there awake. About two hours later I felt like shit; I picked up my mobile from my bedside table and sent a text to Gregory's personal number.

Sherlock - Did it again. I'm sorry. I'm okay but I feel awful. Sorry.
SH

Greg Lestrade - It's okay buddy, are you sure you are alright?
GL

Sherlock - Physically.
SH

Gregory Lestrade - Emotionally?
GL

Sherlock - Crap doesn't describe it.
SH

Gregory Lestrade - Is John in?
GL

"JOHN!?" I yelled.

Sherlock - Let me text him.
SH

Sherlock - John, are you home?
SH

John - No, are you okay?
JW

Sherlock - Fine, take your time, Lestrade is coming over. Boring police stuff. Private matters.
SH

John - Alright, I will go get a pint or two with Sarah. See you later.
JW

Sherlock - Nope, he won't be back till late.
SH

Gregory Lestrade - I'm coming to check on you. Ten minutes.
GL

Sherlock - Door is open.
SH