Love And Hate Letters

Dear Former Best Friend

I know it killed you to see me go. I know you felt like I was all you had. I know that seeing me with another best friend saddens you. I know you want to relive all of those fun times with me. I know you probably think I left you for no reason. You might not realize this, but...

It hurt me, too.

It killed me to leave you. I didn't want to leave you alone. Sometimes I miss those days when you were my best friend. I wanted to relive the fun times with you. I let you go for a reason, and that was for my own good.

I hope you learned a lesson from this. I hope you took my advice, and learned from your mistakes, to stay positive, and not to just make friends when you need them. I lived every moment with you to the fullest. I enjoyed every second with you while we were still friends. When we started fighting about who was the bad guy, I had to get away. It doesn't mean you won, it only means I tried to get away from the negative energy.

You probably still think it didn't pain me to leave you, but believe me, it did. I did the best I could. I tried to be the tough girl when I knew I shouldn't have been. I gave you another chance, but you blew it. I could no longer be soft with you. When I left you, just know that I did the best I could.

"You're so mean!" You say. No, I didn't change one bit, your mask just came off. I was appalled at what you were hiding from me. I used to let you walk all over me, and you're only mad that I won't take your bullshit anymore. I didn't want to let you go, but I had to be done with your stupid games.

I'm going to be very blunt about this. If you can dish it out, but you can't take it, you need to get yourself straight. I wanted to give you a third chance, but when I'm done, I'm done. So I'm done.

Don't try to make your friends spy on me. The way you treated me and what you did to me is a sole reflection of who you are.

Anyway, I hope your life is going well, and that you're happy. Even though we're not friends anymore, I don't want any ill will to fall upon you. I still want to see you eat, just not at my table.

I only wish the best for you in this life.