I went home broken and devastated. Why do people call it broken heart when in fact it felt like you're whole being is aching. I don't know what to do. I want to drink but I don't have any liquor here at home. I want to break everything that I see but I realized, would it stop the pain that I'm feeling right now?
"Beeep. Beeeep. Beeeeep." My phone has been receiving dozen of messages. I didn't even notice because of what happened.
I unlocked my phone and messages from him bombard me.
"I'm sorry baby"
"Please give me a chance"
"I'll make it up to you"
"Please baby"
And so on and so forth. Nearly 87 messages and 34 mizsed calls.
I quickly deleted every messages/convos that we have. I deleted all photos. Everything that would remind me of his existence in my life. But I know that whatever I do, he is already embedded in my heart and soul. How I wish that we could also deleted the memories and the feelings that we felt.
I stare at my reflection in the mirror. Wasn't I pretty enough for him? Sexy enough? Smart enough? Enough? Tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. I felt so pathetic. So powerless. Weak.
Questions filled my head and I don't know where I would get the answers. Is love never enough?Is sex really necessary when you're in a relationship?Does sex can make people forget everything even their loved ones? Can sex help me forget the pain that I'm feeling right now? Could it help me moved on?
