Relax ( Zarry AU +18 )

six 6

Harry sat up with a sharp cry. He gripped the sheets tightly as he slowly looked around the dark bedroom, trying to catch his breath and block out the images of his nightmare. It took him a couple of minutes to realize he was still in the bedroom of Zayn malik's penthouse. He looked to the other side of the bed but the man wasn't there.

He held his face and closed his eyes. The man had left him after all and he knew it shouldn't hurt but it did. He slowly moved to lie back again, staring into the darkness and letting his mind wander. Everything replayed in his mind again and again. He didn't feel any remorse, any fear – nothing. He just felt numb.

He silently wondered if it was a bad thing that he felt numb or not but the feeling was pleasant. He heard his stomach growl and realized he hadn't eaten in almost three days but he didn't want food. He just wanted the drugs again. Harry wondered if that feeling would always haunt him.

He slowly sat up again and threw back the blankets, shivering as the cold air touched his bare skin. It took the man a moment to realize his clothing had been removed. Harry sighed softly and reached to turn on the lamp sitting on the bedside table. He spotted a melted ice pack on the mattress beside his swollen ankle. At least he kept his promise about that. The man bitterly thought before carefully getting off the bed. He spotted a robe on the lounge chair across from the bed.

Harry got out of the bed, careful not to put any pressure on his ankle. He pulled on the robe, tightening it around his waist before sitting down on the chair, feeling totally exhausted. Every inch of him ached. He was tempted to get back into the warm bed but Harry just wanted to go back home.

He scoffed at the thought. That apartment was not home. He wanted to go back to his apartment, to his comfortable and warm bed. He wanted to see his parents again, his brother and Niall but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Not until Zayn malik and his men were behind bars. Harry licked his dry lips as he thought about how gentle the man had taken him earlier.

It had been so gentle but there was still a coldness there. It was just sex; nothing more and nothing less. He felt so weak as he stood up from the lounge chair and slowly walked to the door before pulling it open. The living room of the apartment was dimly lit by the large flat screen TV. He felt surprised when he spotted Zayn malik standing in front of the large window.

Harry softly cleared his throat but the older didn't respond. He took a moment to simply look at the man. His posture was so calm, so relaxed. He watched as the man reached out and touched the glass, almost as if he was reaching out to grab the world in front of him before dropping his hand back down to his side. The younger furrowed his brows, wondering what was going through zayn's mind.

Zayn turned around and stared at him for a moment before speaking. “You're awake.”

The younger nodded his head, unsure of what to say. The man turned back to the window. Harry swallowed thickly before hesitantly walking over and standing beside zayn. “You shouldn't be standing.” The man said without looking at him.

“It's okay.” Harry quietly spoke.

“Were you scared, Harry?”zayn suddenly asked, finally giving the younger his full attention. Harry looked at him in surprise. He didn't want to admit he had felt scared but he slowly nodded his head anyway.

Of course he had been scared. He was human, after all. Harry sighed heavily. He'd thought that all of his training had prepared him and that he was much braver. Actually doing a case like this was completely different. It wasn't anything like training. The man realized how foolish he had been to think something like this would be easy. It wasn't. It was literally taking everything out of him, emotionally and psychically. The man thoughtfully stared at him before looking back out the window again. Harry really wondered what he was thinking. “Do you ever get scared?” He hesitantly asked.