No Escape

11

Warning: Self harm and suicidal thoughts.

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Jun Seo got up slowly from the floor. His vision was still blurry. His mind was blank for a while before everything started flashing before his eyes. It was past midnight. He went to his room to freshen up.

He felt so helpless, he was tired..it seemed like everything was over..he had no reason to live..
But what if  they need him at some point in the future and by "they" he meant the only two people he loved...Yeona and his mother..

But he knew that he was strong enough to live through that..he had been suffering since he was born...it was nothing new.

He wanted to bring her back right now...no matter what she did to him, he wanted her right in front of his eyes..she was unstable and she needed him, whether she accepted that or not.

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It was almost a week after she left..a week since he properly ate, the most painful week of his life..
He tried to calm himself down, he tried to think about moving on..but he simply couldn't....he was her prisoner, her slave..she was the poison he was addicted to..no matter how much he tried to escape...he couldn't...

He wanted to see her but she showed her presence only in those bitter memories, in his nightmares and in the wounds she gave him..his wounds..he felt that they were healing too quickly...those wounds were the only thing she left for him. He couldn't let them fade away..

He couldn't think straight. He looked at his forearms. A crisscross of cuts and burns adorned his pale skin..same was the condition of the rest of his body. Without thinking much, he went to the kitchen and picked up a small knife. He knew that hurting himself was a pathetic move, but balancing the emotional pain with physical pain wasn't the only reason for him to do that.

He put the sharp edge of the knife on an almost healed cut, pressed it down and dragged it to reopen it. Blood started flowing out and before the fine crimson stream could slide down any further, he repeated the same process with other wounds. He felt like a fool for doing so because he didn't feel any better...it was only numbness that he continued to feel..

It was only emptiness that filled his mind and body...