Chapter Nineteen

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The rhythmic beeping of hospital machinery is what greets me first, followed by the sight of black hair against the white of the bedsheets. At first I think it’s Xavier, but his hair is not that long. I can’t move, not a single finger.
I start panicking, and suddenly the oxygen mask feels like it’s strangling me. The machines beep loudly as my heart rate spikes, and my father’s head jerks up in alarm. ‘Isa?’
When he sees what’s wrong, he practically rips the oxygen mask off my face.
‘Isabelle? Are you alright?’
‘Dad?’ he looks unkempt. His hair is wild, his lips chapped, he has dark circles under his eyes, and in some places the bed sheets have left marks on his cheek.
‘Yes love?’
‘You’re here.’
A nurse rushes in, checks my vitals, and rushes out again.
‘Of course my darling.’ His hand cups my cheeks and he smiles down at me. ‘Where else would I be?’
He’s called me more pet names in this conversation than he has since I was nine. Something inside is telling me to push him away, but I’m ready to grab any scrap of attention he throws at me.
‘I thought you were angry with me.’ My voice sounds weak, scratchy.
‘I am mildly annoyed that you were willing to throw your life away for a mere boy. One I do not approve of for that matter. But,’ he sighs. ‘You’re still my little girl. I’ve lost one child; I’m not at all eager to lose another.’
‘Kaleb, on the other hand, will be rather cross. He wanted to be the first person you saw when you woke up.’

I suck in a sharp breath and regret it immediately as pain radiates through my body. ‘Kaleb. Where is he?’
‘School. It took a bevy of threats to get him to leave your bedside, most of which included taking you off life support. Plus, I told him if you hadn’t woken up in four days, the chances of you waking up today were pretty slim.’
If I had been standing, my knees would have failed me. ‘Life support?’
‘My darling,’ he gives me a sympathetic look. ‘You’ve been in a coma for four days. I can say without a doubt this episode has robbed ten yrs of my life span.’
‘Where’s Terence?’
He flicks his hand in a dismissive gesture. ‘He’s fine. His wounds are superficial. Mere grazes. You took the brunt of the attack. One shot in the shoulder, two in your back. Another inch and it would have been too close for comfort to your pancreas, I’m told. The other two were in your upper left thigh.’
‘Jesus Christ.’
My dad looks at me in surprise. ‘The last time we had that talk, you told me you were firmly agnostic.’
‘It’s just an expression. And you made me go to church anyway.’
‘I did, didn’t I?’
He strokes the dark stubble on his face in thought.

‘What are you thinking about dad?’
‘You like him. Sophia’s boy.’
‘Yes.’
‘My journal is missing. So I assume you know how I felt about his mother.’
‘I do.’
He’s quiet for such a long time I think that topic is closed. Then unexpectedly, he says, ‘I hope you have a happier ending.’
‘I hope so too. Did they drug me?’
‘Who?’
‘The hospital people.’
‘Of course they drugged you.’ My father gives me a look that says I’m being extremely stupid. ‘The doctor said the pain would be almost unbearable, so I instructed him to give you the strongest painkillers available.’
‘Well, I think the dosage they used has to be illegal. I can’t move. Actually, I can’t feel anything above my head.’
‘Oh. I’ll go call the doctor then.

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