134340 Pluto

0.1 | sunny

I

❝Without a name, I'm still lingering around you...❞

✧—•—✧—•—✧

The sky was clear that last night. All you could see for miles out was an inked-out vastness speckled with silvery, twinkling balls of gas. We had loved to get out of the city just to enjoy the soothing scene. It was a way to escape the usual stresses of the world—school work, family pressure, drama from all aspects of life, etc.

Specifically, that day, his family had taken in a new foster kid. The last one had left to go back to their family, and his family was just itching to find another helpless kid from a misshapen situation to use. The Mandia parents couldn't wait to pocket the state-given money meant for the kids and use it for their own "needs"—those needs being a fifty-inch flat screen TVs, absurdly expensive clothes, and material things of the like.

I knew that his three siblings and he had always seemed to have been against the cunning manner of their parents, but they couldn't ever do much, which was why he had told me he was anxious around that time.

"The kid is so cute, too. She's freaking adorable, and her accent just adds to her innocence. I think she moved to the U.S. a few years ago? Mira already learned some Korean and Thai from her. And she's so polite, dude. I was talking to her and in Korea and Thailand, I guess that mannerisms to those older than you are a huge thing so this little twelve year old is over here speaking with such high respect for all of us when we're all literal garbage," he ranted, a little smile taking over his face as it always does when he speaks of the new kids.

I poked his one dimple as I said, "Seems like you've fallen in love with her already."

"How could you not, though? She's just so cute and adorable and she's now my daughter and I want to keep all badness away from her," he cooed.

I chuckled at his playfulness, but the airy mood became stiff and severe when he continued. "You get so attached so quick, Sunny."

"I can't help it, man. These kids come from the absolute, worst fucking situations and still manage to keep themselves together. They're so strong. Her mom used to abuse her. She'd slap her for simply asking what's for dinner because she had only had one little meal at school and she was hungry. She's got scars from the things that were thrown at her. Her dad was nowhere to be found unless he wanted money from the mom. Ying won't even say anything more about him. These situations she's been in her whole, barely twelve year old life could have driven so many other people to just let go on life, but she's still going, and with that cute little eye smile," he ranted, pulling at his hair and sighing. "And then my parents have to go and exist and 'take them in' and become the deep pits that make their lives infinite hell and when they aren't okay with the money they're getting, we have to say bye and God, I hate that word and I don't want to ever have to say it to her."

The reflection of the speckled sky in his deep eyes began to distort, and I closed the space between us when I gave him a hug. The dirt of the ground flitted around our dark colored clothes, making my own eyes water.

I blinked away the blur and looked up at him. He looked down at me, dark brown meeting light hazel.

"Wimp," I muttered.

"Says the one crying because of the dirt."

"Says the crying man."

"You can't even use that. You and I both know that you're the man between us, whether you got junk or not."

"Just making sure you know your place."

"Hey, you being the man doesn't mean I'm some kind of bitc—"

"Hey, watch it, dude. It's Sunday and you've already exceeded your cursing limit," I interrupted him with an innocent smile.

He shook him head and looked away, prohibiting me from getting lost in the maze that was his eyes. "You're so stupid," he said with a snort.

I shook my own head to clear my muddled thoughts, and fired back. "You have a strong influence on me."

Like always, I had hoped he saw past the veiled words to understand the extent of my confession.

Like always, he didn't acknowledge it.

"That's a lie. If anything, you've gotten lamer since we became friends," he retorted, looking back at me with clearer eyes. I said something that twisted his words, he did the same right back, and we separated as we began to nicely bicker. The conversation traveled to the lovely Ying once again, and his demeanor softened once again. The cycle restarted, and didn't end until hours later.

And despite all that time I stole looking at his deep eyes, I never once noticed—no. I never once acknowledged, rather than noticed, the calculating glint that passed his eyes when he looked at me, merely coining it as a beautiful shimmer of the stars in his deceiving warm eyes.

I was blinded by him, but his view of me was anything but unclear. My purpose in his life was certain; the extent of my existence to him was already decided. I could have done nothing about it. All I could do was sit and shiver in his light, his warmth and care too far away to reach me.

If only I had seen it all coming.