tyrants

if it's alright

when i first find your reflection, it's through the thick cheap glass at the bottom of a bottle of alcohol
where the sting of it chafes my throat raw and renders me unable to speak; i just can't look away but i'm scared of meeting your eyes
a few months down the line and i'm giving you my flesh to try and fill the holes in yours because after years of feeling like a lost cause i'll welcome any purpose i can reach out and take – i know i'm just scared of letting you slip right through my fingers
i don't know if i believe in chances but i took one with you, and now i'm willing to hide my eyes and lose my sight until you can love again
because love is a double edged sword and one side is for me in all of my self sacrificing pallor and the facing of all the bright and broken things i'm not strong enough to fight
because in your touch is the unfurling of spring and although i keep trying to remind myself that all the precious things i have grown to adore are the ashes in the chambers of my heart –
with you it is just enough; when you shake my bones i promise you it'll be alright
because i'm breathing desperately even though i know it's not oxygen keeping me alive