Talk Me Down (Yaoi BoyXBoy)

Tough Acceptance

Tough Acceptance

It was a stormy day, but we still met up at our fort. You were quiet. You've been talking less for a year now. Nineteen wasn't an eventful year for us. I felt I've just done something wrong, and I didn't know what it was.

"You okay?" I asked you one night.

"Fine."

"Are you happy?"

"No."

My heart sunk. I always felt I knew how to make you happy, but you always seem off now.

"Anything I can do?"

"No honey. It's okay. Let's get some sleep." You planted a kiss on my forehead and closed your eyes holding me close.

This feeling always made me know deep down you still love me and love us. It was bittersweet.

-

It was when we were twenty I finally realized the bruises you were desperately hiding on your chest. I frowned as you hid away your body.

"Is there something I should know?"

"I want to break up." Your voice cracked as you shivered. "I can't do this anymore."

"Why?" I asked as calmly as I could, but my heart was rapidly going into shock.

"My father didn't accept it, and I've continued this. He is ashamed of me. I am ashamed that I have been lying to him for years now."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I knew this was a tough acceptance, but I didn't expect this outcome.

"It should have been obvious since I never invite you over my house anymore." I could hear the sadness in your voice.

"Hon..." I went to touch you face, but you smacked my hand away.

"My father is sick. I can't keep lying to him anymore. He wants me to one day marry a girl and have a kid. I can't do that with you. I'm sorry Daisuke. This is going to be the last night here."

I tried my best to hold in my tears. The thought of not having you calling my name, not having your touch, and not having your love devastated me more than anything. 

"Please think about this." I pleaded.

"I have stayed because I love you, but I'm hurting because I'm betraying my father's wishes. He's been there all my life..." You cried and scrunched your hair in your palms as your head drooped.

"Okay...if it makes you happy. I am always here just hoping you change your mind..." The waves of pain started to overwhelm me. I didn't want to burst out crying so I quickly got up and ran away back to my home.

I can no longer sleep next to you, come home to you, hold your hand, and be close to you. I can no longer call you my own. Can I talk you down? Can I make a change? Will you ever come back again?

I ran and ran as the liquids escaped my face. I screamed out loud. I wanted to scream all of you out of my system, but you permanently tattooed yourself into my heart and brain.

I didn't know this was the end of a beautiful relationship and the start of many tragic events.

To Be Continued