12 ˎˊ˗

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[ A/N: any male pronouns for Natsu in this chapter is from Fuuto's point of view

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[ A/N: any male pronouns for Natsu in this chapter is from Fuuto's point of view. if you see female pronouns, read it as you would (the male pronouns stop when Natsu and Fuuto start talking and start again at the end).

just a reminder, no one but Ema and Juli and Natsu's parents know about Natsu's identity. enjoy! ]


Fuuto Asahina isn't the nicest guy, and he knows. Don't believe him? Just ask Natsu, 'he'll' tell you all about it. Their relationship could hardy be called neutral, let alone friendly. The two rarely talk to each other, and Fuuto sure as hell isn't going to be the one to start the conversation, no way. They leave each other alone. Coexist, in a sense.


Fuuto isn't stupid. He notices when one of his brothers look like shit. He's not afraid to point it out either.


Natsu isn't in the best shape. Any moron can see it as clear as day. As the days go on, the idol can see his brother's physical health start to deteriorate. Eye bags hang from Natsu's tired eyes. He fell asleep four times during breakfast this morning. Though he claims that he was up studying, literally everyone can tell otherwise. Even Wataru can tell, and the little guy is always late to catch on. 


His mental heath seems to have taken a hit too. Natsu looks paranoid now, looking around, rubbing his neck more often than not.


When your older brother stops you during lunch, wanting advice from him of all people, Fuuto just knows something's up. He knows Natsu is an independent boy. He doesn't take shit from anyone. He never cries, never complains, never goes to anyone for help. So when Natsu asks him about the sensitive and unsettling topic of "crazy fangirls", Fuuto knows when to shut the fuck up and listen.


"Have you ever had any crazy fangirls?" Natsu's voice was soft and strained, as if she hadn't spoken in a long time. The 'boy' leans on the door frame to the classroom, struggling to stay awake. 


Fuuto narrows his eyes very tentatively, sending Natsu a questioning look. What? What the heck? "What? Why?"


"Just answer it," she mutters, letting her eyes flutter closed, temporarily giving in to sleepiness. She didn't try to sound threatening, not that she had the energy to anyway. 


"None were too bad- Hey, are you listening to me or not?" The strawberry-blond nudges Natsu, not too roughly, to which she reacts by jolting up. Fuuto raises an eyebrow.


"What? I'm awake, I'm fine, I'm here," Natsu insisted, slurring her words together, "Continue, Yuuto- I mean, wait, no, Fuhiro. No... that's not it... Wait, Yuuki! Shit, that's not it either..." 

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The girl scrunched up her eyebrows, obviously bitter that she couldn't remember her brother's name. Which was it again? None of them felt right when she said it. As she continued guessing names, they had gotten more and more different and incorrect from "Fuuto". She was starting to get frustrated now.


(When you barely get sleep, these kinds of things could easily get to someone.)


He stares at Natsu with a look that was a mixture of exasperation and mild concern. "Are you so tired that you forgot my name? It's Fuuto for god's sake! That's it, we're going to the nurse's office."


Without warning beforehand, Fuuto slings Natsu's arm over his shoulder, proceeding to walk the two of them to said nurse office. Realizing what he was doing, Natsu quickly pushed herself off him to create distance between the two, stumbling as she did. "What the heck are you doin'? I'm not goin' to the nurse office! I just need another coffee or sumn.'" 


(And she really stressed the word "not'.)


"Yes, we are," he insisted, his resolution, taking hold of her wrist. He's not a doctor like Masaomi, but he can clearly see that she's in need up some sleep. "You have eyebags. You're stumbling, you're slurring. I'm no doctor, but what you need is a nap. Stop avoiding it! I'm not telling you about the stalker fangirls until you finally sleep!"


"You don't understand, okay?!" She roughly elbows his chest, pushing the boy away. Fuuto had to admit, it hurts. "You have no idea about the frustration and helplessness of just laying there and just knowing your sleep time is running out! It's not like I don't want to, okay?!" 


Fuuto is now stunned into silence as she continues on, brushing a hand through disheveled, messy black hair. He could just stare as she continues talking, almost sobbing as she does so, practically crumbling from the inside out. And Natsu does leave out the part where her phone bings continuously at random intervals every night, painfully making it harder to fall asleep Its tiny little screen lights up as notifications practically flood in, Natsu staring fearfully at the device on her bedside table.


"I want to sleep so fucking bad, believe me, and my eyes are just so tired and I'm too tired to move, but that doesn't fucking mean I'll sleep right away, no way in hell," she snaps, digging a hand through her hair again, "I just lay there, eyes closed but fully awake for hours and hours on end and until I feel like I'm gonna have a PANIC ATTACK IF I CAN'T SLEEP. BEFORE I KNOW IT, IT'S FIVE AM AND THEN I FINALLY GET DROWSY. SO YEAH, I MIGHT NEED A NAP."


Fuuto is silent. They stare at each other for what seems like hours. 


"You... have insomnia." It's not a question, more of a statement. Damn, he was smarter than she thought. God forbid he do anything with that information. Knowledge was power, Natsu knew damn well.


"You're smarter than I thought." Fuuto glares slightly in response to her offhanded comment. Natsu doesn't respond, either she didn't notice or didn't care. Most likely the latter. She stares at the ground solemnly, stuffing her hands into her pockets, "Anyway, I'm getting through it, by myself. Don't you dare say a word to Masaomi or Ukyo."

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