All The Colors In One | FILLIE

twenty eight - pink and purple

song - Atlas : Heart by Sleeping At Last

~"I am short of breath
Standing next to you
I'll be the dangerous ledge
You be the parachute"~

Sometimes it felt like it would always be like this; with the both of them against the world, standing side by side, hands brushing slightly until her cheeks flamed. As if the world would seem less wonderful, less kind - without him there. She once read in a book that love could be like the foliage in the woods - always changing with time like winter changed the trees. It was something that she often stuck by, never being interested enough in the concept of love to worry about how long it was supposed to last; love itself to her was simply a four letter word - almost unimportant. But it became so much harder believe when he looked at her that way - eyes warm like the sweetest honey, his smile growing whenever their fingers brushed together as if he knew something that she didn't. It was hard to believe that feelings could change like the seasons often changed the world around them, because right there in those moments - everything felt so real, like perhaps it would always be like this. 

When they finally settled in a spot by the stage, he turned to her with raised eyebrows. "You're still not going to tell me what piece you entered?"

"No" she rolled her eyes. "My parents only saw it this morning."

Finn whined like a child. "But I thought that I was your friend...and friends tell each other things, things that parents don't know!"

Millie huffed. "You're such a child."

He poked his tongue out at her.

She glanced down to his hands, noticing that they were trembling slightly. A small frown took over her smile as she paid closer attention, suddenly realizing the way that his eyes were flickering around every corner of the room. Finn wasn't looking at her, his knees bouncing out of habit as if he was counting down the moments to get out of the crowd. 

Her voice was soft. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he glanced at her then looked away, "why wouldn't I be?"

"You're shaking."

He shrugged. "It's just my stupid anxiety. It acts up sometimes and I can't really stop it, I guess. Don't worry about it, Mill."

Millie's voice hardened. "You can't tell me not to worry about you."

He sighed. "Mill-"

"You...You can leave if you need to. I don't want to force you to stay if i-it is going to be bad for you, okay? Does it make you feel better if you're outside? I can-"

Finn placed a hand on her arm for a moment. "I'll be okay."

He was looking at her in that way, the way that made her breath catch. Her body was still getting used to the way that it reacted around him, the way that a simple smile or soft phrase could leave her mind reeling for hours - heart jumping, knees weakening, throat dry. It was similar to how she had to adapt after she lost her vision, growing new coping mechanisms and routines for her life without her eyesight. Millie was adapting to the new feelings swelling inside of her heart, like a machine with a new built part that it still didn't recognize. But she was no machine and perhaps the feelings that she was just now beginning to label, had been there all along - simply waiting for her to wake up and realize. 

"F-Finn-"

"Ladies and Gentleman, we are now going to present to you the final pieces. They will be unveiled so that the judges have enough time to make their decision, and they will be left on display for your own pleasure. We will notify the finalists when they need to make their way to the stage for the results" the monotone voice came through the microphone.