Nico spent the day with Will, knowing that as soon as Harry's name was called from that Goblet of Fire, everything would go to Hell. So he stuck close to Will's side, knowing the peace wouldn't last but soaking in it. But the anxiety ruined his peaceful day.
The Death Mark on his arm was almost too itchy for him to deal with. Whenever he was near Anubis, the half hellhound wouldn't leave it alone. Something about it wasn't mixing well with his father's heritage, or maybe it was just his imagination. But he never went an hour without thinking about it.
Once it was time for the feast, Nico sat at the Hufflepuff table basically glued to Will's side. If Will noticed, he didn't say anything. Throughout the day, he had heard whispers here and there about demigods, but none worried him in the least. It was like Will's theory was actually working.
But judging by his life, it wouldn't last for long.
"Are you going to eat?" Will asked.
Nico glanced over at his boyfriend before shrugging, lowering his voice so that no other Hufflepuffs could hear. "Why are all the other demigods with the Gryffindors?"
Will shrugged. "Annabeth is friends with Hermione, but I don't know. I guess they want to stick together since most of them have never been here before."
Nico smiled, thinking back to the first time Will, Annabeth, Percy, and Piper had visited him at Hogwarts. "Yeah, I guess."
"No more changing the subject," Will said. "You have to eat."
Nico rolled his eyes. "Not hungry."
"Too bad."
"Will..."
"No, Nico. You're eating," Will demanded. "At least ten bites. I'm not having you almost fade out of existence ever again."
"Like skipping dinner one night would do that," Nico mumbled, but he brought the fork to his mouth. There was no arguing with Will when it came to his health.
Eventually, the food disappeared, and Dumbledore rose to speak.
"When the champions' names are called, I would ask them please to come up to the top of the Hall, walk along the staff table, and go through into the next chamber, where they will be receiving their first instructions," Dumbledore instructed.
The Goblet of Fire was in front of him, sparking and ready to go. Nico felt like throwing up whenever his eyes caught sight of it.
The flames turned red, and a piece of paper came fluttering out. Dumbledore grabbed the paper and squinted at it before his voice boomed out again.
"The champion for Durmstrang will be Viktor Krum!" he called.
Nico joined in on the applause, and even though his heart had sunk into his stomach, he couldn't help but watch his boyfriend and brother, both seeming too into the drawing.
If only the high they felt then could last.
When the clapping and noise died down, another paper flew out and landed in Dumbledore's hand.
"The champion for Beauxbatons is Fleur Delacour!"
More cheering. Nico watched the girl walk up and started to tap his fingers anxiously.
Then there was the next paper, and when Dumbledore called the name, he felt like his entire table was lit by some unseen fire.
Cedric Diggory. One of their own. Nico clapped along with the others, felt a little pride, but something about the boy's aura was too short for his liking.
The Hufflepuffs were the last to finally end their applause and cheering. When the last of it died down, Dumbeldore spoke again.
"Excellent! Well, we now have our three champions. I am sure I can count upon all of you, including the remaining students from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang, to give your champions every ounce of support you can muster. By cheering your champion on, you will contribute in a very real-"
Nico covered his face when he saw the goblet's fire had turned red again. Half of him had hoped it wouldn't work, but he had done everything right.
And another paper came from that cup, one with Nico's handwriting, landed in Dumbledore's hand, changed the whole course of the year.
"Harry Potter..."
Silence. Nico glanced over at the Gryffindor table, tried to hide his guilt. Annabeth was looking over at him in shock, Ron's face was red, even Hermione had been shocked to her core.
"Holy shit..." Will whispered. "What does that mean?"
Nico glanced at Dominic, who's gaze was piercing into him. Shit.
"I've got to go to the bathroom." Nico didn't wait for Will to respond, his heart pounding in his chest and his limbs shaking as he made his escape from the hall. Everyone was focused on Harry as he made his way to Dumbledore, but Nico could feel Dominic's eyes on him as he tried to escape to Mrytle's bathroom as quickly as possible.
He had put Harry's name in the Goblet of Fire. He had done Voldemort's bidding.
He could have just signed Harry Potter's death sentence.
Anxiety and guilt mixed in his stomach and ribs, and before he knew it, he was throwing up into one of the toilets. He could feel Mrytle hovering about, watching, not crying for the first time in forever.
He was a death eater.
More vomit.
He betrayed his friend.
He may have killed Harry Potter.
"Nico?!"
Dominic. Nico slammed the stall door shut, but he could feel the son of Apollo right outside it.
"Don't hide from me," Dominic ordered. "I want to know what you did."
"Go away," Nico groaned. His legs were shaking so bad he thought they might give out.
"No, I'm not leaving." Dominic opened the stall door and frowned when he saw Nico. "Are you...puking?"
"Fuck off." Nico flipped him off but didn't have the strength or will to do much more.
"You said you wouldn't lie to me, and I saw your reaction to what happened with Harry," Dominic said. "You may think you're good at hiding your emotions, but I know you. Maybe even better than your brother does. You were my only friend here for so long. We clicked. And if you hadn't been in love with Will, we may have even gotten together. We clicked, Nico, and I know you. And I know you were guilty as hell."
Nico sunk to his knees and wiped at his mouth, trying to keep the rest of the bile and guilt down. He was evil.
He was the villain.
"Dom..." Nico leaned his head back against the stall wall and closed his eyes.
Dominic crossed his arms. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?"
Nico shook his head. "Every time I even think about it, I want to off myself. You think I can handle admitting it out loud?" He punched himself in the stomach when it felt like a new wave of nausea was going to hit. "Just leave me the fuck alone...please. I'm exhausted. I've lived so many fucking lives and I'm still the evil bastard and I can't turn back, I have to finish it all. But I'm exhausted, and I can't admit what happened to you. Not yet."
Dominic audibly swallowed before he sat beside the son of Hades. It was silent for a few minutes before he reached out and wrapped an arm around Nico's shoulders, pulling him into a hug.
"You're not a villain," Dominic whispered. "You're just doing what you think you need to do."
"And that's what villains do, too," Nico growled.
Dominic shrugged. "Well, maybe so. But villains don't sit in guilt and worry about if they're evil."
"I think you're wrong," Nico whispered. "I...I think you're wrong. Someone said it once, I think, in a quote or something. I heard it from a ghost. 'Villains are victims whose stories haven't been told'. Villains fight for love and family just like heroes do. They just get dealt the short stick, have to do what heroes refuse to do, have to get their hands dirty for what they believe to be the greater good."
Nico got up and glared down at him. "It's not my fault I couldn't be the hero. It's not my fault I was made into the villain. But the guilt is still fucking eating me alive, and I can't admit it out loud. I can't. All I can do is keep going with my plan and hope it works, hope I can save everyone. Because if not, then all of this was for nothing. The blood on my hands is just for decoration."
