11:03 a.m
Do you love me?
Tell another lie..
Do you love me?
Tell another lie..
No..
I don't want to wake up.
I have to go back..
I don't want to wake up..
I have to go back..
I feel dizzy as I open my eyes with the real sunlight.
No..
I am seeing red, I am seeing blue..
I am seeing every color in the room..
I let them blend, because of you..
Grayson..
My heart pounds as I really wake up from the dream I had. It felt different from the others. I actually didn't want to wake up.
I don't give a single fuck about the clues now, I don't want to sleep and see him again just to get my answers.
I want it because all the sensations are real, and not a dream.
This is not a dream anymore.
It is not maze, it is not confusion.
It is reality.
My only reality.
I want to see him.
I want to talk to him.
I can't hold myself anymore.
I don't know what is this feeling, I don't know if I am going insane, I don't want to know.
I don't have the control anymore.
I don't want to take the control.
All these colors, all the sparkles, glitters, sunlights, questions, answers, feelings, emotions, longing, madness, Abu Dhabi, Sprite, strawberry gums, sand, ocean, forest, fireflies, his glowing skin, his starry eyes, fireworks.. fireflies.. fireflies.. Butterflies..
Him..
And all the reality, sleeping pills, Dreamer Tree, death, sadness, madness, happiness, screaming, tears, loneliness..
Me..
I know what is real and what is not.
I hold my chest as I leave my bed, walking like I just came to life.
Everything is spinning, everything is blending..
I can't see..
I slowly reach for the sleeping pills..
One, two, three, four..
Five, six, seven, eight..
Put them in your mouth..
I need to go back to sleep..
Pour a glass of water..
Here we go..
Swallow them..
Don't think about your stomach ache..
Don't look at your shaking hands, don't think about anything..
Sleep..
Ethan, sleep..
So many colors, so many emotions, realities, dreams.. Questions, answers..
Him and I..
It is okay Ethan,
Just let them blend..
