As I soaked in crimson-red water in the bathtub, I had only three thoughts on my mind; my cuts, suicide, and my parents. I've been kicked out after I turned 18 a few days after my graduation. For the past two years, I've been on my own, in debt, and often thinking of giving up on college and becoming a waiter.
Tears streamed across my cheek as I examined the word I cut on my left arm- "LIFE".
Thinking of why I did such a sinful thing, I tried to think of something happy. I frowned when I couldn't picture anything cheerful. Then an idea sparked in my head; right now I could drown myself in my own blood. I can die basking in my flesh and organs. It can be like a horror movie.
Just before I ducked my head under the water, a ringtone buzzed from my phone by the sink. It was that familiar sound- a little bell noise- from a Youtube notification, specifically JackSepticEye's new video. I stopped, wiped the tears away, and climbed out of the tub. I probably couldn't do it anyway.
I wrapped a white towel around my body and another around my auburn-reddish brown hair. Surprisingly, I had managed to get no blood stains on the towels.
After draining the bathtub and dressing in a grey polka dot onesie, I dove into my bed and watched the video Jack had posted. It was another video in his series of playing Turbo Dismount, titled "TWISTY NIPPLE FRESHNESS | Turbo Dismount #23". It made me smirk, something that no one can barely catch me doing.
JackSepticEye was one of the few "famous" Youtubers that could make me laugh. Maybe it's because we were both born and raised in Ireland, or maybe it's the craziness and happiness I had once shared before. Whatever it was, I could watch his videos nonstop.
*****
The clock in my bedroom ticked 10:45. It was a Saturday morning, it seemed. Groggy with aching bones, I stretched and dressed in my casual clothing. After eating a bowl of Cheerios, I headed out the door with a pencil and sketchpad in hand. Drawing in the park became a hobby for me recently. I drew endless sketches of dragons, band logos, and whatnot.
I sat down in my usual spot, just a park bench facing a field of grass. The droplets and mist of the field released a sense of freshness. I breathed in and out and started to draw, which kept my mind off things.
I never lifted my pencil off the paper. I sketched for hours on end, focusing on the drawing of Toothless, a dragon from DreamWorks' How To Train Your Dragon.
I was disturbed by a figure towering over me. Nervously, I whipped my head to see one of my idols grinning at me and my drawing. The split second I recognized him, I almost fainted. My tongue was in a knot when I tried to say something, but not a sound came out. I just awkwardly gazed at him with my jaw dropping to my heels.
"Hello," he tipped his hat. "Good morning to you."
"You're, uh..." I stuttered, but managed to get back to my senses. "You're Jack, JackSepticEye!"
"You must be a fan, you can take a picture with me if you'd like."
"I can?!" I squealed in a high pitch, followed by my hand covering my mouth.
Sean chuckled at my voice crack. "Yeah, you can."
I snatched my phone from my pocket and we both took a selfie.
"Thank you so much!" I shook his hand, unbeknownst that my sleeve had fallen down to my elbow, revealing the "LIFE" scar from last night.
"No problem, you looked lonely so I thought I'd say hi."
I scrambled to cover up my scar. Sean peered at my arm, shocked from what he had seen.
"Uhm," I mumbled, "That was nothing."
"Is something wrong?" Sean took a sip of his coffee with a concerning look.
"No, everything's fine." I yapped. I sat back down and packed my things, cherry red from embarrassment.
"No, something's wrong," Sean sat beside me, gently holding my left arm. "Please tell me."
I swallowed back the lump in my throat and explained the best I could. "It started when my parents kicked me out after graduation. Since then, I've been struggling on my own with college. I'm swimming in debt and the only thing I could think of is..." I sniffled, and glanced back at Sean, showing a look of sympathy. "You're the only one that's holding me back from suicide."
Sean reached in for a hug. I couldn't hold in my feelings any longer and burst into tears.
"It's okay," Sean reassured. He took me by the shoulders and stared me straight in the eye. "If you want, we could meet and talk more at a pub not far from here, or just here in the park."
"I'd like to meet here," I wiped away a tear and sniffled. "At around 7, if that's okay."
"That's perfectly fine." Sean tackled me in a hug again, tighter than anyone who's ever hugged me before. "You'll be okay."
He stood up and tipped his hat. He trotted away, leaving me to think about the past. I sat there dumbstruck, wondering if this was really just my imagination.
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Cloudy Souls (A JackSepticEye Fanfiction)
Random(A JackSepticEye fanfiction) Autumn is a struggling student in college, seeing no hope for her dreams and life goals. Depression and suicidal thoughts engulf her, until Sean, her idol, ends up meeting her one Saturday morning. The two friends blosso...
