From his way of treating people , to the way he talks to me . i couldnt be more in love with the guy in front of me .
Leone was his name .
Just like his name , he was brave and fierce , yet gentle and kind . He does lack common sense , but thats about it . Every little thing he does , i pay attention to . This might sound like any crush related event , but the one abnormal thing about it is that im a guy . My country's social norm is to be straight , ive tried time and time to educate the people around me . But to no avail , my efforts were made futile .
I could say many things about him , action speak louder than words , what more can i do than to just express his actions through words . He was playful and secretly sensitive , which obviously i took note . Sometimes i feel that im obsessing over him , which at one point i did , and controlled myself . He was one of those guys to steal girl's wallet and watch them chase him . He was very athletic , he was one of guys to carry his school's basketball team .
I guess you could call me a simp , i would spend money with him . My money . He was rather , less fortunate to have the same amount of money i have . We would take a cab to school together everyday , we would hangout on saturday mornings . We would play that one driving game at the arcade . i enjoyed every moment , losing myself in his eyes as he focused on the game itself . I was there to watch him and tap for him . i felt like a dog , but it didnt really matter to me , his happiness was all that matters .
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His happiness was all that matters
His
happiness
was
all
that
mattered
It felt like i was forcing myself to believe such a lie . He knew i loved him , but he didnt want to break my heart . Thats partially why i love him , he cared for everything , even to those that didnt really mean much to anyone . " aiya dont care la " , he didnt mean it , deep down he cared for everu little thing . He believed that every life mattered , be it tint little insects . But if one were to ever harm me , he would go to no extent to protect me .
He knew that i loved him , i knew that he knew , he knew that i knew that he knew i loved him . We just didnt acknowledge it . Our friends discussed about it , i would talk about him everyday , and that was my only personality trait . He didnt want to break my heart , he didnt want a girlfriend cause he knew id be sad . I felt sick , its all my fault . I did everything i could to make sure he knew i didnt like him anymore . The task was a failed success , i did make him think i didnt like him anymore . which is true , i didnt like him , i loved him . cause of that , i doomed myself to more suffering . he had girls hitting on him and things . Still , i had to be there for him . i would watch his basketball matches and still go out to hang out with him , yet there was something telling me , theres still a chance . We lived pretty far from each other , only i could travel to such a far distance to meet him , it was a small country anyway , what could i ever lose ? money of course , i took cabs there just to see his face .
there was a time where me him and a friend hung out together . when he left to fetch his brother , my friend noticed . " you really do love him , huh . you were so happy when he was here , you kept smiling , now that he's gone , your bright smile has turned upside down " . dramatically of course , since when do people in my country talk about romance like that . it only occurs in movies , the only romance that happens is between an xmm , a yp and a staircase .
he wore graphite , and of course i did my best to blend in the crowd , we wore matching graphites . i was happy , but i didnt think he was happy . i kept believing that i was affecting his life , soon it got to me . it got to him too , he thought i hated him at one point cause i avoided him . i had to do everything to make sure he understood that i didnt like him anymore , i believe i was the bane of his existence .
this is the romantic part of my life , he was the closest thing i had to a boyfriend .
TLDR ; gay falls in love with a step yp and both are introverts that are too afraid to do anything for each other and overthink .
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hey uhm , im back ?
so you might be wondering and asking about all the nasty stuff i wrote previously , i wrote that when i was like 8 ? 9 ? idk , im 15 now . my english academically is really good , but sometimes i type too much and miss out words :p .
please feel free to ask about anything i missed out , i have exams comming out soon so like , the next update might take a while . i have problems committing to these type of wattpad stuff , believe me i tried . there might not even be an audience at all , wattpad is kinda dead after all .
from the words i used , im sure you can tell where im from , the names i used here is obviously fake . this is the first time im gonna publish something very secretive . im listening to gymnopedie no. 1 by erik satie while writing this .
and yes this is about a crush i have on a guy , nothing too exciting . just feel like i want to express what ive been through , i mean its not that serious , just putting it out there for fun . till now , i still love him , that was last year . wait till you read about next year .
ok bye .
