The Love That Bounds

08 |The Heart That Cries|

Sanyukta entered the guest room and thanked the man who helped her in carrying her bags, who had a smile on his face from their conversation just moments ago.

"You're a very nice person ma'am, I hope for the best for your and Soham sir's marriage," he wished giving her a small nod and in return received a smile from her.

"Thank you Gopal."

He left after placing her bags next to the couch, with a tired Sanyukta scanning the plain room with drowsy eyes.

She was glad that she was alone as now she could rip each and every thing off her weighed down body and change into something comfortable.

For years she wondered how brides managed to carry the weight of heavy jewelry, makeup and clothes for hours during and after their wedding and still plaster a smile on their faces.

If only others can feel the frustration she was going through.

The breeze coming from outside through the open window played with her nostrils making its presence known to her, and in the process of calming her agitated nerves, she inhaled the fresh air.

It was delightful and soothing.

She scurried over to the bathroom after grabbing her pajamas, and soon after changing her clothes, she headed over to the seat near the window, spending some there with the breeze that calmed and relaxed her body a bit more and allowed her soul to be at ease.

With her mind cleared, she thought about Soham and the situation they were in.

Sanyukta felt bad for him and for all of what he was feeling. He was a nice guy, but was lost in the search of happiness.

All she wanted was for him to find the joy he was looking for; he deserves it, in fact everyone deserves joy in their lives.

Minutes went by and with sleep engulfing her in constant hugs, she went over to the bed and plopped down, it welcoming her into its comfort.

As for the breeze, it didn't leave her side at all. It clung onto her as if it was a second skin.

It was then she remembered her mother who loved sitting by the window to look at the stars and enjoy the cool breeze, especially during the winter.

Though she didn't remember much as she hardly got time to spend with her, whatever she did remember Sanyukta hung onto it dearly.

Her mom would invite her to sit with her, in her arms, her warm embrace that she found immense peace in and within just a few minutes, she would drift off to sleep.

In fact, by the very window she would braid her hair or tell her a story, about what exactly, that she couldn't remember, but Sanyukta knew it would always make her laugh.

She missed her, very much.

Not a day goes by without her memories gracing her mind and the end results always ended up in her smiling with an aching heart  knowing that she wasn't there anymore.

She just smiled thinking of the good times she had with her and turned on her side, resting her head on the pillow and drifted off to sleep almost immediately.
~•~
Soham slowly woke up due to the sun's mischievous rays that danced on his face.

He groaned and snuggled more into the comfort of the sheets but the sun was adamant in him getting out of bed.

Complying with it, he rubbed his eyes, yawned and sat up with the hope that everything that happened the night before was all a dream, but once his eyes scanned the room and fell on scattered rose petals on the floor, he sighed.

"I guess I was wrong, like always," he said to himself.

Moving out of bed, he thought back to his and Sanyukta's conversation.

'Every cloud has a sliver lining, your cloud will get its sliver lining eventually. You just have wait.'

His silver lining was his grandfather, he was the hope of finding the little happiness he could have in his life, but like dust he flew away with the wind into the unknown.

He died.

All those moments he spent with him never failed to make him smile or laugh each time he thought about it. It was the only thing that could change the expressions on his face that only knew two, blank and emotionless.

Soham loved that man with every bone in his body and when he lost him, he fell deeper into the endless pit of darkness that surrounded him.

It was nice of her to encourage him, to help him feel better, but he was drowning and safety was out of his reach.

He has accepted that, and that's the worst thing he could've done; he knew that.

Soham was molded into a bruised soul. He was ripped apart into pieces he couldn't even find, his childhood down the drain, his adulthood full of pretense and putting up a facade and probably his old age full of loneliness and hurt, that was if he didn't kill himself before he grew old.

He wanted freedom from his life and the marriage he never wanted.

He doesn't want to be a burden to his significant other. He clearly had a baggage on his shoulders and he doesn't to unpack it in front of her.

He needed to get away from all of the pain his life was giving him.

Soham cried for happiness but never got it just like he did for love. What was the point of him living anymore?

His parents wouldn't mind him being alive or not as they cared very little to acknoedge his his existence, only when satisfactory to them, and his sister never cared either so why should he still live?

What sense would it make?

He searched the room for a razor, but unfortunately he couldn't find any. His hands twitched with the need to end everything, to end his life long suffering.

Soham entered the bathroom and checked each and every corner for a razor, and soon, he found one.

He exited and stood in front of the mirror, looking at himself and then to the razor in hand. Freedom was so close, it was in his hands reach.

His eyes held so many emotions that he himself couldn't decipher all of what he was seeing swirling around in them.

'Do it. It's the only way,' his mind told.

Taking a last glance in the mirror, he blankly looked at himself.

He placed the shard on his wrist and smiled, as he was finally going to feel freedom, by killing himself.

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