high thoughts

memories of heaven

i'm laying on the floor, my hands twitching a bit once and then, but otherwise i could be considered dead. no one knows i can see them, even with my eyes closed and my face directed towards an empty wall. my mind is suspended almost a meter above my head, allowing me to see everyone's faces of concern whenever my body shakes uncontrollably. the projection of my brain meditates in the air unbothered until i'm thrown back where i belong; my head, and as i move closer to the center the surroundings begin to get whiter and whiter as shadows appear and contour that whiteness into clouds. i'm in heaven, with god waiting for me, they're wearing your face, and so my fears banish as i remember i have already met my true savior: you, and we've already walked among the earth together, that's why god chose to present themselves as someone i've known and loved and lost; and yes, of course i still love you, why else would our divine ruler take your form for me here, in the kingdom come? i greet them with a bow that makes a few strands of hair fall onto my eyes, and the second i blink, everything appears darker; im disappointed, i'm back again surrounded by many worried faces, yet i know you're not with them.