forty

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us again - seventeen 


even after mister park has left the classroom, nothing more than an overwhelming silence and muffled sobs filled the place. memories about that certain night came flooding back, together with the grieve of mister lee's sudden death. of course they predicted something like that after no one heard from him, yet it still came quite unexpected. 

it was a sobbing chan who interrupted the painful silence. "i can't believe it.." with a void expression he stared down at his desk, tears rolling down his cheeks uncontrollably. unlike usual, he wore a plain white shirt and a simple jeans, instead of a designers outfit that made him look ten years older. 

"i.. i wasn't expecting t-this.." seokmin sobbed out, finding it extremely hard to cope any more after all the horrifying things they've seen and been through, clinging onto jisoo who'd been seated next to him.  

the unexpected death of mister lee lay heavy on the already burdened shoulders of the thirteen teens. 

"can we remember the first time we sat here in this classroom?" soonyoung questioned, his voice sounding abnormally calm for the amount of tears that ran down his cheeks. 

"you dumb shit! this is the worst timing ever!" jihoon scolded his boyfriend, trying to hide his tears by covering his face with his hands that were covered in the sleeves of soonyoung's pastel sweater. "no, let him continue." seungkwan managed to bring out in-between grievous sobs. 

"b-because of mister lee, we became one group. right?" soonyoung spoke up again, even his boyfriend softening upon hearing those words that attempted to lift the overall mood. "i can r-remeber how we got together for the first time.. we were all so different back then.." 

"if it wasn't for mister lee, most of us wouldn't have known each other." jisoo acknowledged, helping soonyoung with breaking the gloomy atmosphere. and taking a walk down to memory lane appeared to help at least the tiniest bit. 

"i wouldn't have brought up the gut to start a c-conversation with wonwoo, and look where we are right now.." mingyu spoke, grateful for mister lee's actions far before they even went camping. he earned a small smile through teary eyes from wonwoo, who decided to share his own experience as well. 

"i wouldn't have been able to socially interact with people. let alone actually have friends and a boyfriend. without mister lee i would've been the same lonely loser i used to be." wonwoo spoke in a monotone voice, that actually included warmth instead of the usual cold tone they were used from him. 

"mister lee taught me you shouldn't take things for granted." junhui followed up, being the first one to genuinely smile through the heavy atmosphere. "i've always been quite well-known, i have a boyfriend, i could always get on the football team without having to pay effort. because of him i started seeing more worth in things." 

"took you long to realize that." minghao tried to make a sarcastic comment though it sounded rather sad, which still resulted in chuckles echoing through the classroom and him being caught in a big hug coming from none other than wen junhui. "hey, at least i did. and i love you more than anything." 

"tss, big weirdo." minghao complained, though he held onto his boyfriend equally as tight, treasuring what they had.  

"i think mister lee has changed so many things in our lives." hansol spoke his usual wisdom, hugging onto seungwkan who wasn't able to move up or speak at all. "not only did he create this group, he has changed so much in our way of thinking as well. and i really hope he knows how much good things that man has done to us."

"MISTER LEE!" chan jumped on top of his desk and ignored jeonghan and seungcheol's attempt to get him down, as he faced the ceiling and shouted at the top of his lungs. his action reminded everyone of the same scenario of what he'd done at camp, when they were all seated around the campfire. "THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A HOME! THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE TO US! WE LOVE YOU MISTER LEE!" 

though it managed to make a lot of those in the occupied room laugh, tears started flowing again through the boy's words. in just those four weeks, the thirteen boys had been through so much pain and hardship together. the fear they had at camp about the group slowly separating again once they returned home was now completely vanished. everyone just knew that they would never find friends like this in their entire lives again. 

all because of mister lee they had found friends, love and a home. and that was all they ever asked for. 

the lonely composer who thought he wasn't able to feel human emotions connected with a lonely dancer, who filled his life with light and warmth. 

the boy who didn't have any friends and appeared cold to everyone, warmed up to the biggest asshole in school, who seemed to be the complete opposite of what was said about him. 

the chinese couple finally learned what true love was and stopped taking their relationship for granted, finally seeing the matter of things. 

the gentle american boy had finally found himself in the brightest smile he had ever seen and managed to capture that warmth inside his heart. 

the boy from an iconic trio, well known through the entire school, had found a calm person who was able to show him his self worth and went along at his pace. 

the couple that had been together through a lot of hardships long before camp, had grown ever closer through the happenings that took place and figured out that they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. 

and lee chan, had found a home through this all. he wasn't ready for romantic love yet, and perhaps, you could call him the luckiest among all these thirteen teens. 

"guys, gather around me!" chan jumped off his table as the teens followed his request and stood around him in a little circle. the youngest calmly wiped his tears off as he stuck out his fist, confusing the twelve others. "come on, get your fists together." 

without any objections, everyone followed his lead and got their fists together, waiting in anticipation for chan to say the next instructions. 

"thanks to mister lee i found a home. we built up the most beautiful friendship anyone could wish for and i think we should thank him for that. so lets all raise our hands on the count of three and yell as loud as we can: to mister lee. shall we?" 

smiles were seen and the gloomy atmosphere that used to be there momentarily vanished because of the magical words chan had spoken. they looked at each other with nothing but grateful expressions and thankful smiles, knowing that mister lee was watching them from high above. they knew they had made him proud.

and so, the thirteen teens counted down all together and raised their fists upon staying together for eternity. 


"to mister lee!"







and just like that, psithurism, a book full of friendship, love, traumatic events and thirteen teens, has come to an end.

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