I believe all of us ever cried and asked something to God. I believe there must be a desire in us, there must be something we wanted to have in life, but all we can do is work for it and only God can decide what He wanted to give. I believe on two kind of answers in life, when we got something that we asked for, that is means, it is a blessing for us while when we do not get what we have be wanting for in life, that is a lesson for us to learn.
I had been in situation where I am so desperate to have something in life. So I asked God so hard for it. I worked hard on it. I poured thousand of tears on it. Just for me to achieve that success in my life, just for me to make my family proud, so I did everything that I can. But at the end of the result, where I thought there will be something for me, some light, since I worked hard, I prayed for it but it turned out to be different than I expected. I failed. I did not get what I had been working on. I broke my family's hope in me. I felt so down. But deep inside my heart, there was a faith that I never felt before. When I thought I would be crying, when I thought I would be rebelling, when I thought I would fell into depression again, no, I did not. I did not cry, I did not feel any kind of negative feelings inside of me and that was the moment I thought, yes, when we let God do His part on our life, we will receive peace.
I know I failed but deep down I felt like I won the war. Since God answered my prayer and it was my lesson. So I was thinking, even if I failed it, I did not achieve any success, I said to myself that I actually won and succeeded because I obeyed God's direction. He answered my prayer and I failed it, that was mean He wanted me to learn something or maybe there is something big coming for me, maybe it was not my blessing yet. So if I follow His direction, that is a big win, I told myself.
I keep on holding to that faith. Where I told myself that I need to follow God's direction in my life even if I cannot achieve any of my desires because our life is all about God.
Weeks later, I received a good news saying that this time I did not fail for my application. I was so happy, I cried so hard knowing about it. I felt like it was never been a waste for me to put on a faith to God and it was never been a waste for me to have that kind of respond to the answer of God for my prayers.
What I really wanted say is, whatever the answer God have for our prayers, our respond is showing how much faith we put on Him. When you have a good faith on whatever the direction He is taking you, trust me, you will be somewhere you never expected you will be.