50 shades of Styles

Chapter 15: Soft Limits

“Hi.” I feel unbearably shy when I open the door. Harry is standing on the porch in his jeans and leather jacket.
“

Hi,” he says, and his face lights up with his radiant smile. I take a moment to admire the pretty. Oh my, he’s hot in leather.
“Come in.”
“If I may,” he says amused. He holds up a bottle of champagne as he walks in. “I thought we’d celebrate your graduation. Nothing beats a good Bollinger.”
“Interesting choice of words,” I comment dryly.
He grins.
“Oh, I like your ready wit, Louis.”
“We only have teacups. We’ve packed all the glasses.”
“Teacups? Sounds good to me.”
I head into the kitchen. Nervous, butterflies flooding my stomach, it’s like having a panther or mountain lion all unpredictable and predatory in my living room.
“Do you want saucers as well?”
“Teacups will be fine, Louis,” Harry calls distractedly from the living room.
When I return, he’s staring at the brown parcel of books. I place the cups on the table.
“That’s for you,” I murmur anxiously.
Crap… this is probably going to be a fight.
“Hmm, I figured as much. Very apt quote.” His long index finger absently traces the writing. “I thought I was D’Urberville, not Angel. You decided on the debasement.” He gives me a brief wolfish smile. “Trust you to find something that resonates so appropri­ately.”
“It’s also a plea,” I whisper. Why am I so nervous? My mouth is dry.
“A plea? For me to go easy on you?”
I nod.
“I bought these for you,” he says quietly his gaze impassive. “I’ll go easier on you if you accept them.”
I swallow convulsively.
“Harry, I can’t accept them, they’re just too much.”
“You see, this is what I was talking about, you defying me. I want you to have them, and that’s the end of the discussion. It’s very simple. You don’t have to think about this. As a submissive you would just be grateful for them. You just accept what I buy you be­cause it pleases me for you to do so.”
“I wasn’t a submissive when you bought them for me,” I whisper.
“No… but you’ve agreed, Louis.” His eyes turn wary.
I sigh. I am not going to win this, so over to plan B.
“So they are mine to do with as I wish?”
He eyes me suspiciously, but concedes.
“Yes.”
“In that case, I’d like to give them to a charity, one working in Darfur since that seems to be close to your heart. They can auction them.”
“If that’s what you want to do.” His mouth sets into a hard line. He’s disappointed.
I flush.
“I’ll think about it,” I murmur, I don’t want to disappoint him, and his words come back to me. I want you to want to please me.
“Don’t think, Louis. Not about this.” His tone is quiet and serious.
How can I not think? You can pretend to be a car, like his other possessions, my sub­conscious makes an unwelcome vitriolic return. I ignore her. Oh, can’t we rewind? The atmosphere between us is now tense. I don’t know what to do. I stare down at my fingers. How do I retrieve this situation?
He puts the champagne bottle on the table and stands in front of me. Putting his hand under my chin, he tilts my head up. He gazes down at me, his expression grave.
“I will buy you lots of things, Louis. Get used to it. I can afford it. I’m a very wealthy man.” He leans down and plants a swift, chaste kiss on my lips. “Please.” He releases me.
‘Ho’ my subconscious mouths at me.
“It makes me feel cheap,” I murmur.
Harry runs his hand through his hair, exasperated.
“It shouldn’t. You’re over-thinking it, Louis. Don’t place some vague moral judgement on yourself based on what others might think. Don’t waste your energy. It’s only because you have reservations about our arrangement, that’s perfectly natural. You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.”
I frown, trying to process his words.
“Hey, stop this,” he commands softly, cupping my chin again and pulling at it gently so I release my lower lip from my teeth. “There is nothing about you that is cheap, Louis. I won’t have you thinking that. I just bought you some old books that I thought might mean something to you, that’s all. Have some champagne.” His eyes warm and soften, and I smile tentatively back up at him. “That’s better,” he murmurs. He picks up the champagne, takes off the foil top and cage, twists the bottle rather than the cork, and opens it with a small pop and a practised flourish that doesn’t spill a drop. He half fills the cups.
“It’s pink,” I murmur, surprised.
“Bollinger Grande Année Rosé 1999, an excellent vintage,” he says with relish.
“In teacups.”
He grins.
“In teacups. Congratulations on your degree, Louis.” We clink cups, and he takes a drink, but I can’t help thinking this is really about my capitulation.
“Thank you,” I murmur and take a sip. Of course it’s delicious. “Shall we go through the soft limits?”
He smiles, and I blush.
“Always so eager.” Harry takes my hand and leads me to the couch where he sits and tugs me down beside him.
“You’re stepfather’s a very taciturn man.”
Oh… not soft limits then. I just want to get this out of the way; the anxiety is gnawing at me.
“You managed to have him eating out of your hand.” I pout.
Harry laughs softly.
“Only because I know how to fish.”
“How do you know he liked fishing?”
“You told me. When we went for coffee.”
“Oh… did I?” I take another sip. Wow he has a memory for detail. Hmm… this cham­pagne really is very good. “Did you try the wine at the reception?”
Harry makes a face.
“Yes. It was foul.”
“I thought of you when I tasted it. How did you get to be so knowledgeable about wine?”
“I’m not knowledgeable, Louis, I just know what I like.” His green eyes shine, and it makes me flush. “Some more?” he asks, referring to the champagne.
“Please.”
Harry rises gracefully and collects the bottle. He fills my cup. Is he getting me tipsy? I eye him suspiciously.
“This place looks pretty bare, are you ready for the move?”
“More or less.”
“Are you working tomorrow?”
“Yes, my last day at Clayton’s”
“I’d help you move, but I promised to meet my sister at the airport.”
Oh… this is news.
“Gemma arrives from Paris very early Saturday morning. I’m heading back to London tomorrow, but I hear Edward is giving you two a hand.”
“Yes, Zayn is very excited about that.”
Harry frowns.
“Yes, Zayn and Edward, who would have thought?” he murmurs, and for some reason, he doesn’t look pleased.
“So what are you doing about work in London?”
When are we going to talk about the limits? What’s his game?
“I have a couple of interviews for intern places.”
“You were going tell me this when?” He arches a brow.
“Err… I’m telling you now.”
He narrows his eyes.
“Where?”
For some reason, possibly because he might use his influence, I don’t want to tell him.
“A couple of publishing houses.”
“Is that what you want to do, something in publishing?”
I nod warily.
“Well?” He looks at me patiently wanting more information.
“Well what?”
“Don’t be obtuse, Louis, which publishing houses?” he scolds.
“Just small ones,” I murmur.
“Why don’t you want me to know?”
“Undue influence.”
He frowns.
“Oh, now you’re being obtuse.”
He laughs.
“Obtuse? Me? God, you’re challenging. Drink up, let’s talk about these limits.” He fishes out another copy of my email and the list. Does he wander about with these lists in his pockets? I think there’s one in his jacket that I have. Shit, I’d better not forget that. I drain my cup.
He glances quickly at me.
“More?”
“Please.”
He smiles that oh-so-smug-private smile of his, holds the champagne bottle up, and pauses.
“Have you eaten anything?”
Oh no… not this old chestnut.
“Yes. I had a three course meal with Ray.” I roll my eyes at him. The champagne is making me bold.
He leans forward and holds my chin, staring intently into my eyes.
“Next time you roll your eyes at me, I will take you across my knee.”
What?!
“Oh,” I breathe, and I can see the excitement in his eyes.
“Oh,” he responds, mirroring my tone. “So it begins, Louis.”
My heart slams against my chest, and the butterflies escape from my stomach into my constricting throat. Why is that hot?
He fills my cup, and I drink practically all of it. Chastened, I stare up at him.
“Got your attention now, haven’t I?”
I nod.
“Answer me.”
“Yes… you’ve got my attention.”
“Good,” he smiles a knowing smile. “So sexual acts. We’ve done most of this.”
I move closer to him on the couch and glance down at the list.
APPENDIX 3
Soft Limits
To be discussed and agreed between both parties:
Which of the following sexual acts are acceptable to the Submissive?