stray kids Little space

Guilty

Little seungmin
Caregiver jeongin

Mentions of self harm

When seungmin was younger he had a terrible father that always compared him to other people and telling him he was a disappointed to the family. His sister did nothing about because she was scared of getting in the same situation but she did comfort him when his father wasn't looking.

Seungmin felt disgusting with him self taking his fathers words serious. Once he had even cut himself because he felt like he deserved, how much he wished he never did it.

Flashback

"You are nothing to this family. No one cares for you your mother left us when you were born, thats how much you are hated." He does nothing but lies, my mom died when I was birth from rough labor. My family does love me just not my father. In fact my family hates my father because he treats me like he is a poor bully in high school.

"Those marks on your skin don't help you, nobody cares about what your doing to yourself." He is referring to attaches and a scar on my arm. My father drinks a lot so he doesn't remember doing most stuff to me, he beats me a lot while drunk and once tried to put his hands on my but I ran away that day.

Once he was done with his daily session of bullied his son, I went into the bathroom to shower. When I was done I was looking at myself and thinking that my father was correct. All these scars make me look ugly. One night I had sickly cut my arm with a razor. I thought it would help but it just made me hate myself even more. I never cut myself again after that day.

•••

Today

I had ran from home years ago hearing that I could possibly join a boy band. I knew I could pretty well so I took my chances not sure if what they were looking for but I had made it and was pretty happy.

I loved all my members but jeongin was definitely one of my favorites.

It only took a couple weeks for me to come out as a little to them. They all accepted it especially jeongin. Turns out his childhood friend was was a little and took care of himself. Lot so I happy when he said he would more that happy to be my main caregiver.

We were both sitting in my bed and I was playing a game on the tv. I had never told the members about my self harm scar because I didn't think they needed to know and I really didn't want to think of those terrible time anymore.

I wore long sleeves a lot and if I didn't I made sure to put on makeup to my arms. Today I was wearing a long sleeve sweatshirt and I hadn't put any make up on them. I had trying to win the game when my sleeve suddenly rises up. I hadn't noticed it at the moment, until jeongin had grabbed my arm looking closely.

I was confused what he was doing until I looked down to see him

staring at the white mark going down my skin. He wasn't sure what it was so he felt it and stared at me with shock in eyes when he realized what it was.

"Minnie... did you do this??" That name... I could never hold my self when he would call me that name. My sister would always call me that to make feel better

"What do you mean innie?" I tried my hardest to seem clueless. He looked in my eyes with a serious face "you know what I mean, are you doing this to yourself." I could no longer look in his eyes. I could feel my mind fogging up and I was scared I would slip.

"It's nothing don't worry about it" I tried yanking my arm back but his deadly grip on my arm held me back from doing so.

He scooted closer to me putting my head on his chest. "Please min, is this what I think it is." And this point I gave up and went myself slip knowing my little side could handle its self.

"M' sorry" seungmin said "hey Minnie, can you please tell innie what this is?"

"I was little a year before I joined the company my dad told
Me bad things about myself and would leave marks on my body but one day I cut my arm on purpose hoping it would do something but it only made things worse I-I'm sorry I didn't mean it I p-promise p-please forgive m-minnie.." seungmin was crying but he had tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry baby I wish I was there for you. Nobody should ever have to go through that but you are strong hm." Jeongin took a pause "your such a strong boy" he took seungmin and cradled him on his lap to make him feel better "do you wanna watch and movie and cuddle? I'm so sorry I asked I didnt want you to feel bad about yourself none of that was your fault." Seungmin looked in his eyes seeing tears run down his face, he never had someone care for himself this much "I'm okay it's over now and you are the best person I could ask for, all of y'all I love all of y'all so much... can we watch Disney please?" Jeongin smiled and nodded laying down tapping his chest for min to lay down on. They both cuddled up hopping to forget about this time and neve have it happen again. "I love you too baby."