Vampirism | ✓

15 | Needed Time

I didn't step out of the bedroom until I was sure that I looked normal. My skin had regained some color, my nails were back to normal—and so was my teeth and vision. I even took some time in the bathroom to clean off the blood that was caked on my chin from hurting myself.

I was in my own apartment, but approaching the sitting room was terrifying. Haruto would be sitting on the sofa, and I wondered what he would think when he got a good look at me. Would I look normal to him? Or would the fear from before still be dancing behind his eyes?

With a deep breath, I took a step into the living room space, deciding that it was time to find out. I stood still for a while, refusing to look up from the ground out of paranoia that Haruto might have a look of disgust on his face.

"Are you okay?" His voice was soft, and my heart jumped when I heard the sofa creak, and the sound of footsteps approaching me. I looked up, startling Haruto who took a few steps back.

"Is it safe to hug you?" he asked, after a while of standing still. "I want to hug you." He added, looking me up and down. I licked my lips, nodding my head. He gave me a smile before closing the distance between us and pulling me into a hug.

"Thank goodness," he sighed, squeezing me tightly as he nuzzled into my neck. "I was worried."

About me? I wanted to ask, feeling my heart pound against my chest. It couldn't be, right? Maybe he was worried about his own safety. That made more sense to me.

"So, you're a vampire," Haruto said, pulling away from me. He held me at arm's length, blinking in a way that told me he was dazed. "Sorry, still finding it hard to believe that this is an actual conversation that we're having."

I chuckled at that, watching as he looked behind his shoulder. "We should sit down," he said, turning to smile at me before tugging me by my arm. He sat me down first, then took a seat beside me before looking out into the room. The ghosts that lived in my apartment hovered around, watching us with interest.

I looked down at Haruto's hand that was wedged between us on the sofa. The memories coaxed themselves around his hand like a glove. You couldn't see a semblance of his tan beige skin through the black. I stared at his slender fingers reaching out to stroke them with my own. He took in a small breath, and I looked up, locking eyes with him.

"I live forever," I blurted, not sure why that was the first thing I wanted to get out of the way. "I'm one hundred and four years old," I mumbled, hoping that I did the math right.

"Oh." Haruto blinked when I squeezed his hand. "Oh, okay. I guess that explains why your parents are dead."

I shook my head. "My parents are vampires too. We're born, not made," I said, licking my lips. "Well, mostly born. Some of us are made."

"What's the difference?" Haruto asked.

"Made vampires drink blood," I explained.

"Oh." He nodded his head, like that made complete sense to him. "I see."

We sat in silence for a while, not saying anything to each other. I stared down at the floor, listening to my heart pound in my ears.

"Haruto," I managed to cough out.

"Hmm?" The older man let out, reaching out to hold my chin and make me look up at him

"I love you." My heart raced at my own words.

Haruto smiled. "I love you too."

"I want us to keep dating." I'm not sure where the confidence to make such a demand had come from, but I would use it anyway. "I want things to remain the way they are. I don't want to lose you—"

"I don't want that either," Haruto said, letting go of my face. "But there are some complications," he said, "you live forever, what about me? Do we just stop seeing each other at some point?"

"I could turn you," the words left my mouth before I could think them through. "I m-mean," I stuttered, letting go of his hand. "If you don't mind going to hell and—" I paused, swallowing my spit and not wanting to add the past part.

Killing people.

I mean, Haruto didn't necessarily have to do that. He could eat my blood, but he would have the urge to hunt and might have 'mistakes' along the way, and I think the possibility of having a few mistakes along the way would be enough to deter him.

"Hell is real?" Haruto asked, seeming quite surprised. "It's not something I thought was real." He frowned a little, narrowing his eyes a bit.

I blinked, surprised that was the only thing he seemed concerned about in my offer. "Yes, and it's a given for demons because that's what you'll become."

"I see." Haruto nodded his head. There was silence after his words again.

He looked up, staring at me for a bit before calling out to me "Wern?"

"Yes?" I replied.

"Do you think that we'll love each other for so long to warrant me living forever?" he asked. "I have at least forty more years to go, I think. That's a lot of time to break up."

I licked my lips, thinking about that. I was a little hurt that he was thinking about the possibility of breaking up in the future, but I knew he was just being realistic.

"Well..." I trailed, letting go of his hand before folding my hands on my lap. "I would say yes, but I've lived for a very long time already—a short life for a vampire, but long for you."

"I see," he said, biting his inner cheek. "This is a lot to think about."

"I'll need some time and space to think about it," Haruto said, taking his hand away. I nodded, not trusting my voice not to betray the cries that were lodged in my throat.

"I think I have to leave now," Haruto said. "Let's still meet as usual but give me space to make up my mind. I'll tell you what I think about living forever when I figure that out."

"Okay," I said, watching him get up from the sofa before heading to the main door. The ghosts followed him, standing back when he walked out and shut the door behind him. They proceeded to turn their attention to me, looking at me with curiosity and pity that pooled behind their dead eyes.

"Don't look at me," I said, looking down at the floor when I felt my eyes burn with tears that were of both relief and anxiousness.

Yes, Haruto hadn't told me no, but the possibility that he would in the future scared me. I couldn't help but worry myself sick.

I'm not sure what I would do if Haruto rejected me.