Chapter Twenty Three - So Much To Be Done Before A Picnic

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The whole night Anthony paced the length and breadth of his office, too nervous to sit still. All he could see when he closed his eyes was the pain in hers and it meant he could not sleep, even if he wished to.

Normally when letters arrived addressed for him he would just add them to the never-ending pile on his desk, but he could recognise that handwriting anywhere so he tore it open as quickly as he could.



My dearest Anthony,

Coming back to ton had always instilled fear in my heart, for I feared you to be happily married with a family of your own. You cannot know how relieved I was once we reunited that night after the Danbury Ball to know you hadn't and my biggest fear had not come true.

I naively thought we could pick up where we left off, but we both have grown up the last few years and in turn have our own responsibilities. You as the man of your house and I to help my brother.

Your life has quite changed since we last knew each other and you must look out for your family, now more than ever.

You have always been so full of love, you've always been wild and free, all the reasons why I fell in love with you to begin with. Simon let slip who your mistress is and I can see why you chose her, she is absolutely beautiful and her voice is magnificent. You have always chased every single dream and possibility that you have had and you deserve the world, twice over in fact.

I hope she's home for you because you deserve nothing but that Anthony. She will treat you better than I ever could, I know that. So be happy with her and enjoy the life you will have, please Anthony.

I wish I did not have to lose you, but it would be selfish of me to take you away from her just because I returned to the ton, so once my fathers' estate has been sorted you shan't have to see me any longer and it will be as though I never returned. I cannot say the same for my brother but you and him always got along better anyway.

You deserve the world so please take your chance with love and do not waste your chance at love, you were happy with her so do not let me take that away from you.

I will always love you, deep down in my heart and I wish you nothing but the best.

                            Yours Always,

                            Jenifer

                            xxx



He could not quite believe what she had written. How could she ever believe that Sienna was better for him than she was? Sienna was a mere distraction from what he thought he had lost forever. How could she ever think she was the one to be selfish by wanting to pick up where they left off when that was all Anthony wished for himself? No she cannot leave him, not again. Anthony grabbed his coat and rushed for the Bassets home hoping to make Jen see sense. 


On his approach to the house Simon emerged from the front door and looked at Anthony with a great deal of sadness and a pained look on his face.

"Bridgerton, I think it best if-"

"I think it best that you let me in to tell Jenifer everything because from her letter it appears she believes I am still seeing Sienna, when I am not! You could not simply keep that a secret? I was going to tell her when she was ready to talk Simon! She walked away and asked for time without letting me explain everything. I was willing to give her all the time she needed! But because of you she has told me to stay with Sienna because Sienna will treat me better than she could! How could Jen ever believe that?! She is planning on leaving again and I am not losing her again Hastings, so please let me in" Anthony pleads while on the verge of breaking down on the doorstep.

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