OBLIVIOUS REDEMPTION

CHAPTER 70: The People I Have Come To Fear

~Expose yourself to your deepest fear. After that, fear has no power over you, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes~

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Yasmeen:

Hopes were high. But just like a balloon pushed past its breaking point, hope is fragile. One lungful of air too many and the balloon bursts leaving ugly, shriveled fragments behind, impossible to piece back together.

I wanted love, excitement, a life less lifeless. But, I also know that even the nicest places on earth become boring in due course. The greatest moments become dull and tedious once the flame of excitement ceases to burn.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams I shouldn't be dreaming. Dreaming of a new man to love, Anonymous precisely

On the other hand, Ahmad is being consumed by a weak emotion called Jealousy. His jealousy is like a living thing. Shifting, changing, growing like his rage and my regret.

He has become so Insecure to such an extent that he tries so hard to eclipse my sun because he is jealous of my daylight and tired of his dark, starless nights. Though I think his jealousy is a reflection of his own failures

The more I grow the more he hates, the more he hates the more I grow.

Ahmad and his sisters are busy competing with me while I am competing with no one. They haven't realized that It is foolish for the moon to compete with the sun for the spotlight.

They made me realize that the jealous of an evil person speaks volume. Their hearts knows no peace and everything is wrong to it, It is never pleased.

Whatever I do is not enough. If I do good to them or show some kindness, it hurts them. If I don't, it still hurts. Here I am standing in the middle, a position of uncertainty, doubt, compromise, no clear direction, no conviction, no purpose.

After finishing my chores, I headed to Ummy's to spend the rest of the day with them.

"Good afternoon Ummy" I said with a smile as soon as I stepped into the house, and she answered

I saw Ahmad seated on the couch looking at me, as if waiting for me to do something wrong, something he can scold me for.

He wanted me to go and greet habiba in her room as usual, but Ummy called her. She stepped into the living room with an attitude, I wasn't surprised, because resentment is the hinge of her personality. As smoking is to the lungs, so is resentment to the soul, even one puff is bad for you.

Her face dropped when she saw me smiling and happy and vibrant today. My happiness is like a stab to the chest for her and Ahmad. Other people's happiness is the single most annoying thing to bitter people.

Habiba greeted her brother and ignored me, Ummy had to give her a certain look that made her come back to her senses. She forced out a good afternoon to me, looking at me with scornful eyes. It looked like she couldn't stand the sight of me, she was disgusted by my presence. It's evident that she resents me for not being confined by her limitations.

Here she is, harboring this pulsating lump of hatred burning in her stomach that had only gotten hotter and hotter in the months, like she had been robbed of a confrontation, or an explanation by me, and yet still I maintained my cool. I acted clueless

She went back to her room a few minutes later while I remained seated in the living room. Everyone left after a while, leaving me all by myself

Sure I don't mind sitting alone, but I know Ahmad would be very pissed if I don't follow his family around.