Chapter 27

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"Life was good in Starkovia, at least after my brother and I first settled. My mother never survived the trip, and my father died not long after. Life in the castle was lonely, but Clara made it better."

"Your fairytale princess," Astrid smiled.

We gathered in the center of the sanctuary around a lantern that Stas had provided for us, and I told the story of my downfall. I continued, "My princess. Clara was from the land we conquered, not Mortrean, but I loved her to death. She was cold to me at first, but after she saw that we wanted only good for her people and to have a place to settle, she warmed up to me. We shared a love for poetry, and as things settled in Starkovia, the Ebians realized we could protect them from other neighboring kingdoms who also sought to wipe them out. They hated our presence less and less, and Clara spent more time with me. I mingled among the commonfolk, not finding the life of royalty to suit me, and we bonded. She understood me as a person. She could always make me smile, and we were inseparable."

"Ew," Yra scoffed.

"Oh, hush. Things got complicated when I met with my brother, one day. Theo summoned me to his chambers, drunk and full of mirth, a smile on his face. He told me that he was going to ask Clara to marry him."

Astrid gasped, a little thing, barely audible, and bundled herself up in her blanket.

"This would make him Starkovian by union, something Starkovians cared about but Mortreans had not considered. For us, you were royalty by action or by blood. You proved your worth and could rise in rank, not like the Ebians. Ebians required their royalty to marry into the family or be born into the royal line. My brother aimed to solidify his position by becoming Starkovian by law."

"Even though he knew you loved her?"

"I was heartbroken, of course, because I loved Clara. Even if she did not love me in a romantic way, I worried that Theo would keep her from me, and our friendship would be destroyed. Things got complicated when Clara told him no."

"Wow," Yra muttered. "She said no to being a queen? I had always heard from plays in town when I was a child that she wanted to be queen but fell ill. Or in some versions, she said yes but was mysteriously murdered. Why didn't you tell me this?"

"It's... it's hard. She said no not only just to being a queen, but to Theo. He was enraged when he heard the news and declined rapidly from there. Fits of anger turned to broken furniture and shattered glass. I was called to his chambers again only for him to tell me that Starkovia was going to war."

"With whom?" Yra asked.

"You've never heard this story?" Astrid probed.

"Not all of it. Also, history bores the hell out of me."

"A neighboring country that no longer exists," I said. "Lytanebar. He told me we deserved more land, more power. I saw not a reason to expand any further and our resources could not handle it. We got into an argument. He claimed that I was no longer in service of the throne and that I had betrayed the family. We got into a massive fight, which ended in him accusing me of sleeping with Clara behind his back."

"Were you?"

"No. Of course not! I respected her autonomy and would never betray his trust. Besides, I did not know if she loved me or not."

"Then you killed him," Urien muttered.

The room grew silent. Astrid looked at me, pain in her eyes.

"I killed him, yes," I admitted. "He came at me in his bedroom, madness in his eyes, and I pulled a poker from the fire. He lunged at me and fell upon the sharp iron. That was his end."

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