King of Dust

Chapter 38

Astrid took my hand as I entered the wagon. The door blocked the firelight as she closed it behind herself, and I heard Yra mutter, "Welp... I'm going into town."

"This late?" Urien's muffled voice came through the canvas.

"My sleep schedule's shot... I'll get a good amount of sleep eventually."

"Stay safe."

The world outside the wagon fell silent. Astrid fumbled her way around the dark until she found the pile of furs that had been laid out in the back of the wagon. She pulled her cloak around herself in the chill, and whispered, "Okay, so what do I have to do?"

"You don't have to treat it like it's a secret," I laughed. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"I want to help you feel better. You've been working so hard, and without you we all would have died."

"That's a little bit of an exaggeration."

"Don't sell yourself short, Darius. You did a good thing."

"I suppose I'm just so used to people telling me that because of my nature, I'll never be redeemable."

"People need to change their minds."

I sat down on the furs hesitantly. I had never thought of biting her. Out of all the people who wandered into my castle, she was the one person I had vowed to leave alone. She was too precious, too pure for this world. I knew she could feel my hesitancy, and as I settled myself on the floor, she scooted a little closer to me. I sighed, my breath not producing any puffs of steam as it exited my lungs cold. "I appreciate you, Astrid. You've been so nice to me."

"You saved my life, Darius. I grew up in a basement and I ran away. I figured that... that a king would be kind and lovely to me, like they were in the fairytales, and you were. You fed me and read me books and kept me safe from the world. For that, I cannot even begin to thank you."

"No need." I smiled, my heart fluttering. "It was my pleasure."

She put her hand on mine and it made my heart thump one solid beat. It returned to stillness after the fact, but it impressed me that she could make me feel alive like that.

"Go ahead, Darius. I'm not afraid."

I sighed. This felt like trimming a flower from a bush. Once the bloom had been removed, it was only a matter of time before it withered and died. I would have rather cultivated the plant, watering it and keeping it exactly as it was, and though I had fed several hundred times before, this felt dirty. Perhaps it was because she was the first person who ever genuinely believed in me, believed that there was still some goodness in this old, rotten, bitter heart.

I did not want to take that from her.

I harbored one last moment of hesitancy before I gently pushed her fiery curls away from her neck. She smelled like the oils she had used when she bathed last, in the castle after curing Siv of her vampirism. The myrrh lingered there, and I held my lips still before going in. Her breath hitched, as though she were afraid.

"Don't be scared," I said. "It won't hurt. I promise."

I licked her skin, and a murmur left her lips. She flinched and recoiled away from me, so I paused for a moment. She gripped my hand and whispered, "Sorry."

"I'm sorry," I said. "It'll help with the pain. I'm not trying to be a pervert – promise."

"O-Okay."

I bit into her, for the first time since we had met, and her blood flowed into my mouth. Blood, you might be thinking. Nasty. Tinny. Globby and coagulated. To vampires, it is the elixir of life, sweeter than honey and smoother than wine. I drank, her heart pumping her essence into my mouth, but after only a moment, I stopped. I kissed the puncture site and licked it again, closing the wound. She exhaled as though she had been holding her breath. My tongue glided over my lips, her blood giving me a little color for once, but I was quick to wipe any overflow away with my dark handkerchief. No good looking unprofessional.