Toast of the Season

❀ Chapter 5 ❀

❀ Lizzy ❀

The punch is most refreshing and I'm grateful for the chance to sit for a moment. I look up into Lord Westworth's perfectly lovely blue eyes as he says, "I have decided to help you in your search for a husband."

I don't respond right away, as his declaration has caught me off guard. I was not forewarned that I might get offerings of help from gentlemen in attracting a husband. "I cannot claim to understand how all of this works, my Lord. I had quite a sheltered childhood growing up. I admit, I am not certain I understand why you have taken an interest in me tonight and are now willing to help me find a suitor."

He is leaning in closer now so that we can hear each other over the music and chatter. I breathe deeply as I catch his lovely scent. I find the smell even more pleasing now, as it is starting to become familiar to me. "Miss Cavendish, I am still recovering from the loss of my own dear father two years ago. I can only imagine that the recent loss of yours is very painful to you. I understand from your cousin that if you don't find a husband, you will be required to obtain a position. So I have decided to help you in your search."

I feel my eyes mist a bit at the mention of my father. I have not even had a moment's peace to grieve properly. I have cried in my bed a few nights but otherwise, I have had to put it out of my mind. I would not have expected Lord Westworth to have so much empathy for me. "You are most kind, Sir. I would gladly welcome your aide. You are correct that I am keenly feeling the loss of my father. But I try not to dwell on my emotions unless I have solitude so that I am not overcome in public."

He has taken my gloved hand now and is rubbing a thumb over the back of my knuckles. I think he means to be supportive. The feeling his tender caress gives is certainly distracting me from my sadness. "I understand, Miss Cavendish. Let us speak of other topics. As I have been weighing your options, it would help if I knew what your preferred characteristics are in your future husband. Have you given any thought to it?"

I sigh before I begin. "A little, I admit it seems unlikely that I will suit anyone." His look encourages me to continue. "Well, any suitor would need to be wealthy." I pause to think. "Either wealthy or..." I note surprise on Lord Westworth's face. His mouth has dropped open and his eyes are as big as I've seen them. "I am so sorry, is this not what you meant?"

The startled look leaves his face, "I do apologize, Miss Cavendish. I think you will always say something that surprises me. This is exactly what I meant. You would prefer someone affluent or..."

I think I might understand his astonishment now. He knows most girls here would like someone rich but few would admit it to a stranger. He is wrong about my motivations and I should clear up the confusion. "My Lord, I do not prefer a wealthy man for my own benefit. I require it, because I have no money. My suitor must either be rich or he must have no desire of money because I come with none. I grew up with quite modest means and am glad to live in such. But I will not be able to attract a husband who is in need of a dowry. That is what I intended, I am sorry to have shocked you so."

His face looks quite contented again. I'm glad that he is expressive, I do not like it when I cannot read a person's moods. "I understand, Miss Cavendish. So you would be comfortable with say, a clergyman who has a modest home if he suited in other ways also?"

I smile, "Yes, that would be ideal actually. I would probably prefer to help run a small household as I have no experience with a large one. I would also like a husband that has hobbies, work, or other interests to occupy his time. I need a good part of most days to work on my Physics experiments and I would prefer not to be forever entertaining or in need of amusing my husband."

Lord Westworth nods, "They are opening up the banquet rooms for supper. Let us go stand in the queue while we continue our conversation."

As we make our way to the banquet room I think more about the requirements of my husband. "It would also be important that a potential suitor be open minded about women's er... abilities. It would be unlikely that I could keep my science activities hidden from him, so he would need to be comfortable with my work and the possibility of publishing articles of my discoveries."