They barely spoke over the next week or so, merely co-existing in the same house. Sidharth still insisted that they take breakfast and dinner together and that they sleep together but he never touched her in bed, maintaining the distance that she had insisted on. Some part of Shehnaaz was relieved while another, even larger part, regretted the loss of the one bond they had shared. Still, she kept telling herself that it was just sex and it had never meant anything.
Besides she had other, more immediate, concerns. Like the fact that she had thrown up every day for the last week and the fact that she was still stricken by dizzy spells at the most unexpected times... like the fact that her period was late now than it had ever been before. Shehnaaz was relieved that the intimacies between her and Sidharth had ceased, because he was as familiar with her cycle as she was and she would really prefer absolute certainty before telling him anything. She also wanted time to figure out what her next move would be.
Yet another decision taken from her, she reflected bitterly but at least Shehnaaz could decide the time and place to tell him, if indeed she was pregnant, which she desperately hoped was not the case. Shehnaaz worried at her lower lip with her teeth, staring blindly at the design she had been working on for most of the week. It was supposed to be a necklace but it looked like no necklace she had ever seen before. Shehnaaz shook her head in disgust; she could not seem to get anything done. It was the equivalent of writer's block and it was extremely frustrating. Her cellphone buzzed discreetly and she snatched it up, welcoming the distraction.
She had been exchanging text messages with Humera all day and was expecting the message to be from her cousin. She was rather unpleasantly surprised to see Sid's name in her inbox. He usually refrained from contacting her during the day. Shehnaaz frowned down at his name, not all that keen on reading the text. Finally she exhaled gustily and clicked on the message.
"Eating out tonight. Dress: casual. Business thing'. Will be home by 6. Dinner @ 7:30"
She groaned, Sidharth and his damned "appearances"! She was tempted to simply refuse but didn't have the energy for the argument that would ensue. At least he'd forewarned her this time there had been a few incidences in the past where he had simply come home and told her that they were going out in an hour. A couple of times the events had been formal, leaving Shehnaaz to scramble for appropriate dresses and silently cursing the fact that she hadn't even had the opportunity to have her hair professionally done.
Sighing softly, she gave up on work for the rest of the afternoon and instead decided to get her hair done. Looking good tonight would give her ego a boost if nothing else.
Sidharth was home promptly at six. Shehnaaz was curled up on the sofa, flipping through the coffee table book by an extremely popular photographer, which she had just purchased on her afternoon excursion. Sidharth was a wildlife photographer but his subject matter this time round was a lot closer to home. His latest anthology, entitled "Man's Best Friend" was all about dogs. Shehnaaz, being a huge sucker for dogs, hadn't thought twice before buying the book.
Sidharth paused in the doorway and she looked up to see his arrested gaze on her hair. Shehnaaz lifted a self-conscious hand to her newly-cut hair, knowing that it was a big change. She had had her waist length fall of hair cut to just below her jaw. The style was straight and sleek, with a feathery fringe and Shehnaaz loved the way it made her look and feel like a new woman. Something she was so desperately striving to be.
Her hair had always been long, her father had absolutely forbade her to cut it and Shehnaaz knew that the one thing Sidharth absolutely adored about her, aside from her bosoms, was her hair. When he was having sex with her he was always touching, stroking or tugging at her hair. Now she waited with bated breath for his inevitable negative reaction to the cut which framed her face and emphasized her large, brown eyes and high, delicate cheekbones.
