Part 1

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Mummy seems even more stressed these days, and I don't know why.

She's usually stressed, but something feels different now. It's like her worry has grown bigger, and I didn't think that was possible, and that makes me really sad.

Cory is to blame.

He's not a nice man, and Mummy knows it, I know it, too. So does everyone else. I can't understand why we don't leave him.

Cory says I am supposed to call him Daddy, but I heard him once. He said he wasn't my real Daddy, and I wished I could be far away from him. So I refuse to call him something he isn't. He also said Mummy isn't my real Mummy, but I think he was lying. Cory likes to lie.

I don't understand why we haven't left yet. We always leave.

We never stayed anywhere this long. Mummy and Cory typically get into a big, massive fight, one much worse than their daily fights, so we leave—just Mummy and me.And for about a week, things are good because it's just Mummy and me, no Cory. But Cory finds us. Cory always finds us.

Every time Mummy says we aren't going to go back with Cory, she will promise me we will never see him again, that we are finally safe. But every time he comes back. We end up back with Cory, back with the same old problems, just in a new place.

We move a lot.

When it's just the both of us, I can go to bed and actually sleep without worrying about what might happen when my eyes are closed. Even if most of the time, when Mummy and Cory split up, we sleep in the car, I still feel safer than in any house or apartment I have been in with Cory.

Car sleepovers are the best.

He is scary when angry, and Cory spends a lot of his time angry. He's like Abomination.

I once heard one of our old neighbours say Mummy has the worst taste in men, and I think that might just be true because I have seen other daddies with their children in the park, and none of them has acted as Cory does with me. They all seem nice. Cory isn't nice- not nice at all.

Mummy tries to protect me from Cory; she really does, but sometimes she can't. Sometimes, he hurts her so severely that she can barely move, let alone protect me.

I hate that Cory hurts her.

I hate that I can't protect her or make him stop.

I hate Cory.

I wish we could leave and never see him again. Everything would be so much better without him. It's been nearly a year since Mummy and Cory's last break, and I don't understand why we haven't moved yet. We never stayed anywhere this long.

I heard Mummy and Cory talking once, and Cory said it wasn't safe to stay in one place too long, or they could find us, and they would be in trouble. That was a long time ago, though. It has been a long time since I have heard anything. I don't know who would find us or why we would be in trouble, but Cory seemed to worry about it. And if it's bad enough to make Cory worry, it's probably horrible.

I wish we could leave Cory, even if it were just for a week. I could really use a break from him. He has been worse than ever lately, and Mummy seems to have just given up. I would rather sleep on a park bench than spend a minute longer in that flat with Cory. I wish Mummy would understand that.

Cory has never been like other daddies.

Not like the ones in the park or the ones in the movies, Mummy sometimes lets me watch while she and Cory have adult time in their room.

No, he is angry, and he yells and throws things and hits. I don't like it when he does any of that, especially when he hits.

Cory bought me a Barbie for my birthday this year, which was weird. He usually forgets or tells me I don't deserve him wasting his money on me.

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