Me and the young ones

1. Meeting the young ones

I had surely knocked 54 times, but noone came. People were fighting inside, apparently about who would open the door. An incredibly angry, high pitched voice shouted "Neil" repeatedly on someone I guess was named Neil. Apart from being named Neil, he was also an utter bastard and a hippie from what I heard. "Well, it can't be worse than my last student housing" I thought, grabbing the door handle. The door exploded, and I changed my mind.

"What the actual.. are you trying to kill me?" I brushed dust and bits of door from my shoulders as a tall lanky man with long brown hair came to meet me in the doorway. He held a burning pot in one hand and looked like he hadn't showered for weeks.

"Uh, sorry, we didn't want to kill you, we actually wanted to kill me.. I mean, that's what Vyvyan said."

"Ookay.. I'm Marie, I am in kind of a desperate situation.. I have nowhere to stay for the moment, but I heard that my cousin lives here?"

"Ah yeah you must be Marie Pye? Then I must be Neil, your cousin!"

He shaked my hand with his free hand (the one without the burning pot). Wow, I really had some weird cousins on my dads side.

"Come in, come in. You want some lentils?"

I followed him inside, and was met with the worst interior I had ever seen. The open area with a kitchen and a living room was almost green from filth, and there were bits of trash everywhere. You could totally tell it was only guys living here.

"I'm sorry I didn't open the door, I was just about to, but I was in the middle of making these lentils.." Neil began, but was violently hushed by someone.

"SHHHH SHHH SHHH SHHH!! I'm trying to watch this teenager-oriented BBC2 show!!!"

The aggressive voice came from the sofa where a man sat, completely absorbed by something on the TV. He was wearing a black blazer full of pins and with an anarchy symbol painted on the back. His short light brown hair was cut in a weird way, with cute little braids in the neck.

"That's Rick, but he's watching his programs now so it's best not to disturb him."

"Neil, you're disturbing me solely by EXISTING" Rick said, without taking his eyes off the TV. "Where's the food? And who was at the door NEIL??"

"Uhm.."

"One of your beatnik so called friends? Who is it? Tell him to get lost, this isn't a youth hostel you know!!"

"Uh.. what was your name again?" Neil asked me.

"Marie."

It was like an electric shock went through Rick, he flipped around to us and pierced me with big, wide open eyes.

"A bird? I mean, a girl?"

"Uhm yes, hello to you too" I said, a bit uncomfortable with his intense stare.

Rick dramatically stood up as if in a trance, then proceeded to slowly walk towards me without breaking eye contact, or even blinking. I could hear him mumble something:

"The sound of her whispered hello

Came tiptoeing softly into my head

I opened my eyes kind of slow

There she was smiling

It made me feel good

The day I met Marie"

I'm not sure if he tried to seduce me, his lunatic way only intimidated me. It came out as if I was some sort of prey he had set his sights on.

"It must be one of Rick's poems, he's some kind of poet you know" Neil said.

"It's actually CLIFF RICHARD you uncultured bastard!" Rick snapped. "The indisputable king of rock n roll, and everything else. Right Marie?" He turned to me again, caressing my shoulders.

"Who's that?" I asked.

Rick twitched his hands away like I suddenly had become red hot. The atmosphere turned really tense.

"Oh no" Neil said. "Hey Rick, I'm sure she has a good reason not to know who Cliff Richard is.. Marie you're like, from another country, right?"

"Yes I'm actually an exchange student from Sweden" I explained, grateful that Neil defended me from the tantrum Rick was on the verge of throwing.

It looked like Rick was going through an internal battle until his face broke into a sleazy smile again.

"Hahaha funny there, you're such a funny girl, the funniest girl I met." His loud laughter sounded really strained. I wouldn't be surprised if I was the only girl he met.
"You must be disoriented from all the jetlag" he continued, "and having to deal with this bloody hippie bothering you, the utterly most boring person in the world." He glared full of disgust at Neil and then looked back at me with quite the opposite of disgust.
"You know Marie, you're a very attractive girl despite not knowing who Cliff Richard is" he said, sliding closer to me and awkwardly putting his arm around my waist. Leaning in he whispered against my cheek:

"Just like a summer breeze

I remember her kiss

So soft on my brow"

A short man with sunglasses and golf clothes entered the room just in time to save me from being kissed. "Who's this gal?" he asked.

"Hi Mike. That's Marie, my cousin" Neil said.

Rick tore himself away from me in shock, his face twisted in disgust. "Your cousin?? Neil?? You're related to NEIL!? Marie you fascist liar, you DEVIL WOMAN, seducing me like that!!" He looked like he was about to have a panic attack, or throw up. His mad gaze wandered around as he wiped his hands on his trousers, backing away from me not knowing how to deal with this conflicting barrage of emotions. Then he suddenly turned around and ran upstairs.
Boy, he had some serious mood swings.

A small commotion was heard from the stairs, as if Rick had run into someone.

"Move, I'm trying to blow up the stairs!" a new voice shrieked.

"Could I atleast go up first?" Rick cried.

"Make a run for it."

An explosion went off, and soon after that a red-haired punk with a nose piercing and metal stars on his forehead wearing a denim vest full of studs entered the kitchen.

"I've never seen Rick in such a hurry for a wank" he said. "Seems like he exploded too early. What's for dinner Neil?" He walked almost as funny as he talked, and sat down by the kitchen table.

"Well I think it's gonna be same as yesterday."

"But we had nothing yesterday??"

"Yes, there are plenty of left overs."

The punk then looked at me.

"Hello. Are you that girl Rick was gonna wank off to?

"Uhm I don't know about that. I'm Marie, nice to meet you." I extended my hand. I felt I wanted to be on the good side with this fella. He hesitated for a moment, then brought out what looked like an amputated hand to meet my handshake.

"Don't worry, it's not Rick's hand. Would be too cruel taking away the only thing that brings him joy. This is a total other bloke, for my student thesis. I'm Vyvyan by the way. Did you like the door explosion?"