♡ chapter 9. ♡

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Where I'd spend most of my time on vacation was at the beach. I'd go with my friends everyday but since I met james, I never wanted to go out, I just wanted to stay at home with him, even if we weren't alone, atleast I was with him. He also started coming home quite frequently, more than he usually did.

That day my friends were begging me to go out with them after two weeks of not seeing them. So I accepted and we all went to the beach. Romeo couldn't come, which honestly i hoped for because meeting him was really tough for me since I felt extremely guilty. He was part of our friend group which meant I couldn't escape it and it always the reason why I couldn't bring myself to break up with him each time he messed up because I knew it would get awkward in the group. So I just decided to shut the f*ck up and dealt with it.

"Yo what's going on with romeo?" My childhood best friend, valeria, she knew me by heart and could tell something was different between me and romeo.

We both sat on the beach with our feet dipped in sand while the others played volleyball

I awkwardly laughed
"What do you mean what's going on? Everything he's good he's just not available right now si-"

"Lo c'mon. You can lie to anyone but me you know that damn well"

She was right, there was something wrong but I just couldn't tell her. How can you tell your best friend youre f*cking your stepfather I could never tell anyone about this secret, I didn't care about myself but I cared about james. I never wanted him to get into trouble.

"Val i promise you there's nothing wrong, else you'd be the first person to know"

"I don't know you've been distant for two weeks, didn't even get a call or a text or anything"

"I'm sorry it's just- I just wanted to be alone and chill a bit you know?"

"Since when do YOU want to chill" we both giggle

"F*ck, lo is it your mom again?" Valeria and romeo were the only ones who knew about how messed up my mom was. Ever since my father died, she always saw me as a competition. Even when I was just a kid.

"Yeah she's been really f*cking annoying lately"

"I knew it, new boyfriend?" She joked

"Yeah, more like new victim"

"Lets hope he isn't an asshole this time"

"Actually he isn't, that's why I feel bad for the guy, he don't know what he got himself into"

"Hahaha- no way- well maybe he'll act like a parent more than your actual mother"

Oh- if only you knew...
That's what I said in my mind, but obviously kept that thought to myself.

"Yeah... I don't care to be honest"

"Shut up you need a parent figure lo. Your mom should be lucky she has a daughter like you, if it was me I'd be a living nightmare to her everyday"

I couldn't help but feel guilty, I knew I was a bad daughter but whatever I did, it would never make my mother proud, so after a while you just stop caring about her validation. Doesn't mean you have to f*ck her boyfriend- it's just- it's different with james. He was different.
I never wanted this on purpose it just happened. Atleast that's how I tried to convince myself.

"I'm fine on my own, I've always been val"

She stares at me and does a compassionate smile, as she close her eyes and hug
"Okay but just know that I love you and you can tell me anything"

I nod before swallowing the huge lump of guilt that I feel.

"Yo romeo!" I hear in the distance and my heart drops, I look at Valeria who caught my drift. He was the last person I wanted to see, I wasn't ready to face him, wasn't ready to face reality

"Hey baby" I hear him yelling, and I rub my forhead before facing him and waving while drawing a fake smile on my lips
He approached us

"I think imma go swim guys" valeria says before getting up leaving me alone with him.

"What are you doing here? Thought you couldn't come" I questioned

"Wow happy to see you too babe!
"Well I figured you didn't have a ride home so"

"Well I was obviously going to return home with them-"

"C'mon babe, you prefer to be stacked up in a small car or comfy in my car? I don't see the problem"

"It's not that- thank you, but you didn't have to worry"

He kisses my forhead and I cringe deeply

"It's okay I love you"

"Love you t-"

"Yo lo!" I hear another voice yelling in the distance
Heavens!, why the f*ck was everyone calling me now, I cover my face with my hands to hide from the piercing sun and squint my eyes trying to see who called me, It was my friend Rosario

"There's someone looking for you, over there"

"What-" I turn my head and,

God for a brief moment I thought I was dreaming. He stood there, black sunglasses, those big and strong muscular arms shaped like a god in his tight black shirt with his sleeved tattoo peaking out, his hair swaying through the wind and his arms crossed, it was james. Something about seeing him made everything feel more exciting, I was happy to see him, still curious, but happy
But what the hell was he doing here? Was I in trouble?

The world just stops when he is there, I completely ignore everyone around me, I ignore romeo's questions and I run up to him, leaving everyone confused.

Even with those dark sunglasses on, I can still feel him analyzing me from head to toe, I was sunburt in my teal blue bikini with sand all over my ass cheeks and thighs. Something was slightly different about him, he seemed serious, there were no playful smirk on his face which alarmed me

"What are you doing here?" I say quietly, almost worried.
He pauses for a few seconds and he takes a deep breath

"It's- your mother doll-
she Is in the hospital."

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