over and over (i fuck myself over) | bnha

chapter two

 Most people would consider themselves lucky if they could recall their dreams. Katsuki did not consider himself fortunate when he woke drenched in sweat, recalling his vivid nightmares. He would wake up with his heart racing and the sweet scent of caramel filling his nose. One irrational move, and he could scorch his sheets again, and he didn't need Aizawa asking him prying questions about why he needed spare sheets.

With a heavy sigh, Katsuki pulled himself out of bed and tugged off his drenched shirt. His chest felt tight, and his mind was swimming; the nightmares and the thoughts should have passed, but they were still fresh and at the center of his mind. He ran his hand through his slicked hair, deciding to take a quick, cold shower and try to ease the night terrors out of his thoughts. It was still a bit early, and he wouldn't have to be up for another three hours, but there was no way that he was going back to bed now.

Not after he had that dream.

Katsuki doesn't know if he could call it a dream but a twisted memory. It had been clear as day to him, and Katsuki still shivered in fright from the events. He had been no older than ten years old, and he had gotten in trouble for mouthing off at one of his teachers (the old fart deserved it, and Katsuki would have done it again), so the school informed Katsuki that they would be informing his parents of his little problem. He brushed it off, thinking that his mother wouldn't say anything about the matter and that she would understand that he (Katsuki) was in the right and that there was no reason to punish him.

The walk home had been ominous, and Katsuki could feel his stomach twisting and churning with utter dread. His mother should understand that the teacher was out of line, and Katsuki only returned the same energy, so he should have been in the right of way, yeah?

When he stepped into the house, Katsuki swore that the temperature in the air had dropped several degrees, and his stomach turned once more. The house was so quiet that it frightened the young boy as he navigated the halls. Mitsuki had left a note for him, but he was too anxious to do anything. He was alone for hours, finishing his chores and starting his homework, praying that Mitsuki was in a good mood when she returned home.

It was late at night when she returned home, and Katsuki was in his room, finishing the rest of his laundry, when she came storming in with a belt in hand. The poor boy barely had time to react when the smooth leather cracked across his exposed thigh. He howled in pain, trying to move away from her wild flails, but that only made her angrier, resulting in more blows to whatever she could hit.

"I didn't send you to school to act a fool!" Mitsuki hissed; her jaw clenched as she brought her arm down and struck Katsuki over and over again until his legs were red with welts. Letting the belt drop to the ground, Mitsuki glared down at the shaking child before she spat out, "I shouldn't have to get a call from your teacher while I'm at work because you want to act like you're hard shit! Fix your face before I give you something to cry about!" she snapped before promptly leaving the room, slamming the door behind her.

Katsuki felt so weak that day, and he didn't understand why his mother was so violent towards him. His legs stung for hours, and he was certain Mitsuki cut the skin, but Masaru hushed him up and attended to his open wounds. He made excuses for Mitsuki, saying they only punished him because they loved him and that he would understand when he was older.

Oh, or how it hurt them more than it hurt Katsuki. They weren't the ones left on the ground, massaging bruised and red skin after every beatdown session, but sure, they were the ones in pain afterward.

After that day, Katsuki made sure to train his body so he wouldn't cry from Mitsuki's beating and random attacks. It was a long and painful task, but the results were worth the blood, sweat, and tears. He could withstand Mitsuki's random smacks now, and he never flinched as much when she brought the belt down on his backside.