Keeping Secrets (Book I)✔️

Chapter Seventeen

Florence:

I told Jake everything, from the beginning to the very end. I told him about Eric's offer last year, how he was different with me compared when others were around. I told him about keeping it quiet, about keeping secrets. We never told anyone about each other and how it didn't matter to me for a long time but recently it was getting a little too much to handle. Hell, I even told him about getting drunk at Evan's party and Mick walking in on our make out session.

I was in too much pain to be embarrassed right now, he just hugged me when I told because he didn't know what else to do. After I stayed at Eric's house a while ago, I went to the shop with my Dad and Jake had been there. Since then we had gotten closer but I didn't know why I trusted him with this.

"I just feel so stupid." I said, my voice muffled by his soft hoodie.

"It's okay Florence." He patted my back and released me.

"It's not like he cheated on me or anything, I get that we had no strings. But I can't help feeling hurt, it was awful to have to watch and he didn't even know I was there." He nodded in agreement as I spoke.

"I think that it's understandable for you to be upset, I really do. But I don't know whether Eric will understand, he's never really seen you with another person either but if he really likes you, he would be jealous, and he would feel the way you do right now." He said.

"Should I still talk to him?" I asked, I really didn't know what to do. As much as I wanted to go back to the way it was I couldn't. I knew that there was a chance Eric had been seeing other people all this time but the aching feeling inside of me made me realize that I couldn't and wouldn't have something like this with him anymore. Jake looked at me for moment before speaking again.

"I don't know. I don't want to sound blunt or mean in any way Florence just hear me out." He warned. "But because it was a no strings sort of thing, well, things like that will always happen. If you want to still be with him then you have to get used to that but I don't recommend it, now that you have feelings for him. Things can go bad between you two because it's one-sided."

"I don't have feelings for him." I said quickly. He gave me a knowing look.

"Really? You still think that? Honestly Florence, you have to have realized by now that you at least have some kind of feelings towards him. I know he's a dick and all but you can't help who you fall for as they say." There was a pause for a short while in the car, I was thinking. Thinking about everything that has happened between us two, all of the things I kept from Eric about how I felt and how hurt I was right now. It couldn't mean I had feelings for him could it? Or was I in denial?

We talked about it more in the car. I had stopped crying a while ago and Jake drove me home, noticing it was getting late and he didn't want my dad to be worrying about me. As we neared my house and Jake parked outside, he told me something.

"You know Florence, we don't know each other long but if you ever have a problem don't hesitate to come talk to me okay?" he said before I hugged him tightly.

"Thanks for being there." I smiled weakly at him and then went inside.

That night, I just couldn't sleep. I was tired but my thoughts decided to keep me up. All that occupied my mind at first was Eric and the things he had said to me over the past while that stuck in my mind.

God I missed you.

Just because I don't want to go out with you doesn't mean I don't care about you Flo.

You mean something to me.

You aren't like anyone else and that's what I like about you. I care about you Flo, more than you can ever think.

Were they lies? Maybe he wanted to string me along; I was just someone on the side to keep him busy if he was bored. I just didn't want to think about it like that but I couldn't help myself. I was angry at myself for falling into this trap. Yes, he was the reason I was feeling like this but I was too because I hadn't stopped myself when I had the chance.

It felt like a million things were running through my mind at that moment. I tried to figure out what to do about Eric, did I really want to be with him after what I saw? Sure, I knew that he could see other people and so could I but you don't know what or how you're going to feel when you see them together until it actually happens.

Chloe and Eric. I turned over to one side again and closed my eyes shut, trying to get the image of them two out of my mind but hadn't Eric told me they were just friends that night at the party. Had he only realized he liked her recently or had he been lying all along.

I wondered how and when I would confront him. I was going to look like a fool, I really was. Like some clingy girlfriend that wasn't even his girlfriend. I was the one hurt because I cared about him, and he didn't feel the same way back. What would he even have to say to me? I wish he would just explain his mind games to me, I had had enough of all of this.

I was unsure about a lot of things that night but one thing was certain as I rested my head on my tear stained pillow: I loved Eric.

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I know this chapter is a little short too, I'm sorry. But I would like to thank everyone who was read and voted on this story, it means the world! I have gone over 300 views and am delighted. So I would just like to say, thank you so much!

A. Summers xo