The Dreamer ✓

Letter 28

NO.28; A LETTER TO A FAMOUS PERSON

JUNE 18th, 2014

Dear Amy Winehouse,

Evelyn cried when you died. You're her favourite artist of all time. She has all your songs, she keeps a collection of your CDs on a shelf above her bed. She listens to them when she's going through hard times, like when she broke up with Harvey Willis in the summer of 2011, she had Back to Black on repeat for three days straight. It drove the whole house mad but by the end of it, she bounced back to her old self. You give her the courage and the strength to carry on in a way no one else can. I once thought I didn't have anyone like that. I used to think I was alone in this world and that life was just one big solitary walk but it's not. At least, I don't think it has to be.

You see, I had an interesting conversation with Evelyn a few days ago. Evelyn and I finished our final exam, I had Government and Politics and she had Geography. As soon as we got in the car, and started driving off, she put Valerie on blast.

I wound down the windows and let the cool June wind swoop in.

Evelyn bobbed her head to the song and sang so badly I couldn't help but laugh. "Valerie! Valerie! Valerie!" She grinned, "Did you have to go to jail? Put your house on up for sale, did you get a good law-yer-er-er?"

She had caught the attention of a few people on the street but she didn't care.

"Thank fuck we're done with these exams. Thank fuck I don't have to see or hear Mr Weinstein's whiny voice ever again," She said as you continued to sing on the stereo, "I'm gonna go home and sleep for ten years and then get so smashed at Narumi Hamasaki's party next week I won't remember my own name." The traffic lights had just turn red and Evelyn came to a stop behind a grey Toyota. She glanced at me, "You coming by the way?"

"To what?" I said, "Narumi's party?"

She nodded.

"Uh...I don't think so...Narumi and I don't really talk anymore so, no. It'd be awkward if I just turned up to a party I wasn't even invited to."

"Oh please, Narumi won't care and anyway, if you're with me, she can't say shit. Just come, most of sixth form will be there..." she smirked, "James will be there."

My stomach did little flips, I tried to keep my face as impassive as possible. I swallowed. "So?"

Evelyn rolled her eyes and looked ahead, "Please, Morgana, I know you like him. You were all buddy, buddy, smoochy, smoochy, a few weeks ago...and now it's just – I don't even know. You've been all quiet and don't think I didn't see the way you and James looked at each other in the library this morning. I ran into his older brother yesterday and he says he's been walking around the house looking like a kicked puppy. And you...you've been all quiet and avoiding school." Her eyes flicked over to me, "What the hell happened?"

I bit the inside of my cheek as my mind travelled back to that late May in the bookshop. I wanted to tell her that I'd run away like a coward after he'd kissed me. I wanted to tell her I'd been ignoring his calls and texts and that I didn't have the courage to just face what had happened and talk to him.

"It's....complicated," I said.

"No, it's not," she said and I looked at her, surprised to find her eyes were already trained on me. "Life isn't complicated, Morgana. It's pretty fucking simple. People just like to say it's complicated so they can either justify their crappy decisions or run away from them. Now, don't bullshit me, do you like him?"