HIDEAWAY

SPILL AND SPOIL

Routines, schedules and rules are things we set voluntary so that we don't encounter surprises in our ordinary lives. Avoid surprise factors. Should you side with me? It truly does not matter but I occasionally want to let loose, speak my mind, my heart to be more specific.

On a recent trip to the most beautiful sites in my country - with my LAST-YEAR friends plus a character I love more than Wattpad - an opportunity rose. It was like those moments in the action movies where the protagonist only has shot, I was not to mess it up. My mission isn't well supported, even in the 21st century, I was to ask a guy out. Well I blame it on a book I read here once - more than once actually - titled "Kissing Is The Easy Part". It makes my mission so diverse and brave. You'd think that I had grown a pair but on the contrary, I was to get wasted and cowardly admit my feelings for him. The loop would be that it was the booze. All it went according to plan, but no sunset shit in my story. Instead he looked at me  - not drunk at all - he said that he has always known, found it cute, liked me and all that "am not interested, make you feel better" shit. I felt my stomach turn, anger fueled me, tears stunk my eyes. My dry throw let out a squeak as I sourly laughed and took a huge goble in my glass - I had never ever drunk this stuff - "you fool! you think that he was going to embrace you, wrap his huge arms around you, now how you'd love that" continously rang in my head. I was broken, torn, embarrassed but most of all I could never look at him again.

I know that life is bullshit and crap, some people are my unlucky, others are his lucky. Loved for being themselves. Bullshit! So next am time gonna read some romance book am gonna reality check some things, I will let them be fiction. Fictional fucked crap, with all due respect to Rainbowbrook ( read her works please ). But if there is something that won't change is this addictive routine of reading great creations on Watty, and I only hope what I write gives someone motivation to keep using Wattpad.