My Lame Thoughts

i'm tired

hi i'm literally so fucking dead rn. Sorry I didn't post anything last week. This week has honestly been so shitty and I just want to throw myself off a building so sorry if i'm just rambling in this because its like 1 in the morning right now and I don't even know what i'm doing. 

So last Saturday I saw my dad for the first time in like 3 years. I haven't talked to him at all because he is just a massive asshole but he wanted to see me because he wanted to wish me a happy birthday or whatever. He just bought a house and I went over there and hung out with him. And I guess it was going pretty well for like 40 minutes until his dumbass wife and my 17 year old sister came over. I also haven't talked to my sister in like 3 years so it was probably way worse seeing her then my dad. I guess my sister has been living there for awhile now I guess instead of a foster home like before so I don't even understand why she is allowed to stay with them. 

My dad and his girlfriend both decided to get drunk and make snarky comments about my hair and my clothes. This wasn't shocking to me of course but holy shit I didn't come there to be bitched at for like an hour. I swear to God everytime i'm around anyone in my family they just start drinking and yak about stupid and mean shit for hours. Like my parents got divorced when I was 15 but my dad didn't move out until I was like 17 because he literally can't do anything right and they still got drunk together. I just decided to bail and I made a excuse to leave and as I was leaving I saw my loving little sister and I said "Hey Katie." and she just glared at me and said "Fuck off lesbian." and slammed her bedroom door right in my face. That was the first time I talked to my sister in years.

I wasted so much time going to that shithole I was so fucking upset. I don't understand why I bother trying to reconnect with my family still because it is always SO pointless. I probably woudn't have a problem seeing my family if they weren't a bunch of alcoholic homophobic assholes and it just makes my head hurt I hate it so much. I don't even know anymore i'm just tired and stressed about everything. The traffic is currently really awful because of Summerfest because I live around that area and it took me nearly an hour more to get home from work yesterday. 

This week at work was also horrible but I don't even feel like getting into it. I'm just going to say that teenagers at movie theaters are the WORST like holy shit you have no idea. How come everytime teenagers get together in groups they have to be dumb little shits. I sound like such a Grandma I hate myself. But the brightside of this week was rewriting "bringing mommy back" a little bit. I should continue editing it tommorow if I don't throw myself off a building after i'm done posting this. 

My boyfied and I are watching ghost adventures on Netflix and i'm really bored and tired and i'm eating Goldfish. It's getting lit 2night.

this whole post made no sense but byeeee