What the water gave me

Chapter 1, The Ocean

1

It was in the reddening sea that I first saw her hazy form.

On a blazing summer day my parents decided to drive down to the Atlantic coast on a spontaneous family getaway. We lived only a three hour drive away from the ocean but my father managed to make the journey seem much longer by his constant swearing. He mostly criticised the driving of others and unleashed such a firework of curses that a sailor would have envied his vocabulary. Mum put up with it for about thirty minutes then started to cry.

"James! This is our only shot for a family getaway," she sobbed. "We don't even have the chance to go on a proper holiday together... because of your bloody job!"

My father was a busy bank consultant while my mother, as a teacher, spent most of the summer home. I was an only child and at sixteen I channelled precious little of her energy. From feeling useless, slowly but surely she sank into depression. She would come into my room at least once a day and told me that she'd wasted her life at the side of my father.

I listened to her patiently but my heart pounded in my chest and I stared blankly at the huge Sleeping Beauty poster occupying most of my pink wall. I'd wanted to take it off for a while but my parents had bought it for me in Disneyland. It cost them a small fortune. Also, it was a memory from one of the rare holidays which wasn't a total catastrophe. So I kept it.

I was lonely. I hardly had any friends at school. My parents didn't really care, they were too busy with their own lives. I spent my days reading in my room or embarked on expeditions in our boring, little town.

The trip with my parents was a necessary evil. Fortunately, I only needed to survive two nights with them in the hotel on the beach, then my father would return to his work. I plugged in my earbuds and listened to my favourite songs on my phone, trying to keep reality as far as possible. I imagined the world as an endless music video where my parents were only extras who threw silent curses at each other accompanied by wild gestures. Sunshine was pouring through the dense crown of trees and I put my hand through the open window to enjoy the caress of the warm breeze. I didn't know that my life would change in the blink of an eye, even though the thing that would make me popular and scary in the eye of my classmates was already waiting for me in the water.

It all started with a lonely walk on the beach. When we arrived, my parents and I got rid of our overpacked suitcases in our hotel room. Our accommodation had boring, whitewashed walls, a double bed and an extra camping bed for me. I frowned at its size, it was made for ten year olds. The place was pretty depressing. Yet when I closed my eyes, I could feel the salty breeze from the sea and all I wanted was to run out to the soft sand. As always, my mother broke my enthusiasm.

"Susan, my dear! Sun cream, flip flops, straw hat, towel and most importantly your sun allergy pills!

I rolled my eyes.

"We're in England for heaven's sake! It's the country where children had to take D-vitamin because there wasn't enough sunshine to help their bones grow strong!"

"Mind your language, young lady or you're not going anywhere!"

I walked back to my suitcase with a sigh and quickly got out the things my mother deemed important. Dad opened a can of beer and lay on the bed with a newspaper. I knew he wasn't even going to leave the room.

"Dinner is at six, come back by then! Don't wander off so far that you can't see the hotel!" came my mother's last advice.

I murmured a yes under my breath, then set off to explore the shore.

I had no chance whatsoever to get back for dinner. She didn't let me.