The End Of The Line

Chapter 1

Hey guys! So this is a story my friend SolarCupid and I are doing together. I'm doing the writing part, but she's been there for every chapter written and has helped me develop the idea, and is being extremely helpful just in general. It's rad to have her along. This story probably wouldn't exist without her.

Hi, that was the old note. It is now 2020. I saw this in my drafts and had a "👁️👄👁️" moment so here I am, posting this shit again. If anyone actually reads it. The first chapter is short and pathetic. I haven't looked at the others but they probably are too, but like,,, may as well. Idk if Solar is still sleuthing around or if she'll see this go back up but if she does, sup bro.

Third person pov

"Guys, I think I scored." Hidan sniffed the animal. "Look, it was dead when I found it, but this shit probably won't kill us if we try and eat it."

"Whoa, you found actual meat? In the desert?" Orochimaru peered at him. "Wait a fucking second. That's a chipmunk. Where did that come from? Hidan, I swear to god, if you're carrying animal carcasses around in your backpack again-" Orochimaru hissed.

"I'm not! I really just found it." Hidan said defensively, seeming awfully offended by the sannin's accusations. Naruto and Sasuke both shared a look, not quite believing that Hidan had somehow just stumbled upon a very dead, very large chipmunk in the middle of nowhere. It was way too far-fetched. Right? Right.

"Hidan, we talked about lying." Sasuke said in a scolding sort of way. The Uchiha ws older now. He was twenty-two, and only getting older. He really wasn't sure why he was still alive. None of them were actually positive. There wasn't really anything left for them here, save for each other. Naruto had suggested to them many times that they simply blow themselves up in the most epic of ways possible and then join the party that was no doubt raging on in the afterlife.

"Oh, there it is." A reanimated Sasori hummed. "I was wondering where I'd left him. Thank you, Hidan. I was afraid I'd lost Thomas." The puppeteer said in a genuine voice that made Naruto choke slightly.

"I'm sorry, but I think Thomas is dead." Naruto coughed into his fist a little bit, glancing at Sasuke, who shrugged hopelessly. Sasori, having been reanimated about three or four times now, honestly wasn't doing too great sanity wise. He'd dropped his marbles, and he couldn't find them. They'd scattered. Naruto argued that they no longer existed, but Kakuzu would always counter and assure them that Sasori could, probably, return to the sane side of things.

"Sasori, put the chipmunk down nice and slow. Nobody has to get hurt." Sasuke coaxed.

"You idiot, that's what he wants." Orochimaru hissed. "Your pity and attention. You know what he'll do next--"

"Duck!" Naruto shrieked in horror, and he, his Uchiha friend and a very spooked sannin all dropped to the sandy ground as the animal's carcass flew over head. Only gravity didn't do its job, and the damn thing came back like some sort of boomerang. It earned a scream from Hidan, who was now also in the line of fire.

"Pathetic." Kakuzu, who'd been lagging around so he could count his money, which wasn't of much use anymore, snorted. He rolled his eyes at them. He wasn't sure why he was traveling with these idiots. He guessed it was because they'd brought him back to life, and yadda yadda this, and yadda yadda that. Or maybe, somewhere deep down, he actually cared for these sorry saps. He wasn't willing to believe the latter.

"Okay, you say that now, but last time he threw a dead rabbit at you, and you acted like a nuke was about to go off." Naruto pointed out.

"He's right." Sasuke agreed.

"Okay, okay, no need to fight, ladies." A very exhausted and not-too-happy Kisame trudged up. He was the last of their little band of revived criminals and war heroes. He was dehydrated, his gills gasping for water that wasn't there. Oh what he'd give to be in the ocean right now. He could swim down, enjoy the sealife. Leave these losers in the dust. They were his friends, but this was the end of the line for them. There was nothing on this war-torn Earth for them anymore.

"Fine. You take the chipmunk." Naruto shrugged, snatching the deceased creature right out of the air and chucking it towards the swordsman. Sasori hissed in retaliation, and both Kisame and Kakuzu let out surprised shrieks, diving right out of the way. Kakuzu would be damned if some disease from some dead mammal was going to be the end of him.

"Damn, this sucks." Orochimaru shook his head as Kisame and Kakuzu panicked, throwing the animal between them, neither of them wanting to touch it or have in near them. Hidan was too busy restraining Sasori so he'd stop flinging it around to really care. "Look at us. Look at us."

"I'm looking, and I've got to say, Houston, we have a problem." Naruto gave a mock salute that earned him a whack over the head.

"Shut up, idiot. Orochimaru is right for once in his slimy, pedophilic life." Sasuke said, and Orochimaru gasped, clearly offended. He put a hand over his heart in mock hurt, rearing back and giving Sasuke the most taken aback and surprised look he could manage to plaster on his pale face.

"All these flavors, and you chose to be salty--"

"Okay, shut the fuck up and help me." Hidan kicked at Naruto's leg, but was too far away to meet his mark. He groaned as an angry Sasori writhed between him. Hidan had simply gone limp on top of him, lying on his back and not moving. "This damn man-child is going to snap my neck eventually, dammit." The Jashinist hissed.

"You're immortal." Sasuke said.

"Um, how can I be immortal when I have nobody to sacrifice?" Hidan scoffed, lowering his head as the chipmunk flew over it. Faintly, you could hear Kisame sobbing in the background, and Kakuzu begrudgingly comforting him.

"Touche." Orochimaru said, and he and Sasuke descended to help the cultist.

"Oh how the mighty have fallen." Kurama chuckled.

"Nobody asked you." Naruto grumbled before joining the dogpile.