I am
Tainted
Impure
Unwanted
I see
Dripping red
Colored pills
Angry lines
I feel
Pain
Misery
Disgust
I want
Revenge
Justice
Murder
I just want
To feel like
Me
• • •
Every pain was a reminder of things that happened inside me.
Growing slightly, I knew what was to be.
Missing something I knew that I needed.
Warning signs everywhere; I should have heeded.
One way to rid myself of what would become,
Is to end it soon; become undone.
This grotesque feeling under my skin,
made me feel I was full of sin.
Nine months is all it would take.
Nine months, leaving chaos in its wake.
It cannot happen; I would rather die,
than give birth to this creature, a pesky little fly.
With tears in my eyes, here I stand.
Legs shaking, hanger in hand.
Of how to do this, I am not sure.
But I know that this is the only cure.
I take take a deep breath, Here I go.
Painful feelings start to grow.
Blood is everywhere covering the floor.
Then suddenly, there is a knock at the door.
I continue as I was, choosing to ignore. Then I hear a voice that shakes me to the core.
My mother is here for a nice, little visit.
Her timing, though, is not so exquisite.
She knocks at the door, urging me to answer.
I stand still, avoiding her like cancer.
Finally she leave, thinking I'm not home.
Listening to her steps, my thoughts begin to roam.
She has done nothing, she deserves to know.
But what will I do if she thinks I'm a ho?
Here she is, taking the easy way out.
Here she is, too cowardly to shout.
If only she knew what came to be.
If only she knew what happened to me.
***
YOU ARE READING
Noni
PoetryWho is she? Is it me? Is it you? Your friend or neighbor? A relative? Is it the girl in your class? The girl you saw walking down the street? The one with silent tears in her eyes? We can't be sure, so for now, we'll call her Noni. TRIGGER WARNING...
