Meant to Bea

CHAPTER FIVE

Mistresses!

Bianca growled and punched her pillow for the umpteenth time that evening. Anger pumped through her veins with such speed, it nearly drove her insane as she remembered her conversation with Mr. Belington a few hours ago.

After his announcement of being incapable of falling in love with her, she had been hurt. She had been so hurt, she had fought all through their journey to Bath, not to make eye contact with him for she feared he would see the effect his announcement had on her. She feared she would break down in tears before him.

Then, she woke up to find him undressing her on the bed, and something in her snapped. She imagined him taking advantage of her, using her to bear his children and tossing her over to the side like a piece of discarded rag. Before she was able to control herself, she spewed out her venom, demanding that their marriage be nothing but one in name only.

She remembered the look on his face as she made her demands; a look of confusion. Rather than remorse, rather than fall to his knees or pull her into his arms and promise to love her, he sought to know whether he could have mistresses!

She let out a mirthless laugh, tears trailing down her cheeks. Her blood boiled with hurt, anger and confusion, causing her intestines to feel like they were being twisted into a painful knot.

Burying her face in her pillow, Bianca gave into her tears. She cried until the sun broke forth from the clouds, warding the darkness away. When she finally crawled out of bed, her head hurt and her stomach churned from hunger.

She made her way to the windows and pulled the heavy curtains aside to let the sunlight into the room. Turning from the window, she made her way back to the bed and settled on the edge. She would wait for a maid to show up to help her get ready. She couldn't risk going down the stairs looking like a wagon ran over her. Hopefully, the maid would help conceal the swellings she knew were under her eyes, and the paleness of her face...

Just as the thought drifted through her mind, a knock sounded on the door.

“Enter.” She sighed and rose to her tired feet just as the door creaked open. Turning around, she took off her coat. “Help me out of this dress, will you?”

Silence followed her request for a few seconds. Then, just as she was about to turn around, she heard footsteps cross the room. She sighed as the maid undid her lace. Pushing the sleeves off, she let the dress slip to her feet. The maid helped her out of her undergarments, a soft sigh of relief escaping her lips. She reached up and slipped the pins from her hair, causing it to fall to a mass on her shoulders.

“I would like a bath,” She said, turning around...

Gasping in horror, she stepped back and slipped. Bracing herself for the fall, her eyelids snapped shut just as strong arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her against an even stronger chest.

Afraid to open her eyes, Bianca held her eyelids shut, her senses very much aware of her unclad body pressed against his. His hands on her bare skin filled her with warmth and a barely containable desire to press her lips to his.

“Are you alright?” His warm breath tickled her lips.

She nodded furiously, eyes still closed. “I tho-” Her voice was heavy with desire. She cleared her throat and continued. “I thought you were a maid.”

“I can no longer afford servants.” His arms maintained their position around her waist. Unable to restrain herself further, Bianca was about to give in to her desire to kiss him, when his next words halted her. “I had hired them for a few weeks to prepare the manor for Lady Carla's arrival.”

His words were like a slap to her face. Fearing she'd break down before him, she pulled away and nodded. “I shall help myself get dressed.” She didn't dare open her eyes for her tears were already on the verge of falling.

“I made breakfast.”

She nodded. “Thank you.”The words barely formed on her lips.

“I will be downstairs.”

Unable to speak, she nodded and held her eyelids shut until she heard the door clicking shut. Then, she tore her eyelids apart and staggered to the bed where she gave in to her tears.

She didn't go down for breakfast that morning... Or lunch... Or dinner. She did nothing but lie naked in bed with a pillow over her head.

***

Several unchaste thoughts ran through Race's mind as his fingers tightened their hold on Bianca's unclad form. His eyes drifted longingly down the length of her and like the time in the boarding house when he walked in on her naked, he could barely contain himself.

But just as quickly as the thought drifted through his mind, he remembered her words of the evening before; she wanted nothing from their marriage, nothing but his last name. The thought of it alone left him feeling upset, and it verified his suspicion that she snuck into his bed in rebellion against her father. To her, he was nothing but a pawn and now that they were married, she hoped to use her freedom to be with her many lovers.

“I had hired them for a few weeks to prepare the manor for Lady Carla's arrival.”He said in response to her admission of mistaking him for a maid. He wanted to remind her that it was not his wish in the first instance, to be married to her.

He scanned her face as he spoke, and saw for the first time, that her face was swollen and white. Dried tears stuck to her pale cheeks and there was a pink blotch on the tip of her nose.

She had been crying!

The thought was like a stab on his chest, filling him with guilt. However, before he could do anything, she pulled away from his arms, making his arms feel empty.

The conversation didn't last long after that. He invited her to breakfast, and she didn't show up. Neither did she show up to lunch and dinner.

Afraid she'd fall ill if she chose to carry on with her refusal to eat, he carried a tray of porridge up the stairs and knocked on the closed door.

“Bea?” He leaned against the door, hoping she would open it, yet wishing she wouldn't for he feared he wouldn't know what to say to her. Yet he feared he wouldn't sleep tonight if he did not get the chance to at least speak to her, and smoothen things out between them.

He knocked a second time, but she didn't respond. Sighing, he dropped the tray in front of the door, and made his way to the guest room.

And like he had feared, he didn't sleep at all that evening.

Copyright © 2018 Lily Orevba All rights reserved.