Day 75.0

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Axel

I look down the road, squinting my eyes as I stare blankly. It is bright outside. Too bright. You would think that with our recent losses, it wouldn't be so bright. But nature does not mourn as we do. At least I haven't seen it. I've been praying at nothing, asking for rain. Even if God did exist, He wouldn't spare me a day from the grueling sun. Because that would be too good if He did that.

I was never part of an overly Christian family before this. Once my mom died, my dad stopped going to church. She was the only real reason why he'd go. I'm not sure if he ever believed in God. If He does exist, He has a funny way of showing that He loves us.

Mason didn't make it, go figure, but what he had said to me... it stuck. He struggled with trying to identify himself as an individual, instead of just comparing himself to his father. I really think that's why it stuck so much. The reason why I could resonate with him so well. Our fathers are shit.

He tried saving Meredith, but it was stupid. There is no doubt she is dead. It was an act of suicide, just to prove that he isn't his father. Why couldn't he have realized that he didn't need to do that to prove that he isn't his father? It was such a stupid waste of his life.

He closes his eyes with a sigh. After what seemed to be an hour of me just kneeling in front of him, he seems to finally rest. I quickly put my ear against his chest, no detection of a heartbeat. I gulp dryly looking at his scrawny figure and pale skin.

"Can I?" Marthie asks, kneeling beside me. She takes her knife out of its sheath and moves her trembling hand with the knife to the side of his head. She gives him a kiss on his forehead and swipes a stray strand back. She starts fighting back tears, looking at me with despair. I grab ahold of her hand holding the knife and take the knife out of her clammy fingers. I line up the tip of the knife to his head and force myself to submerge the knife into his head. I pull the knife out slowly and hand it back to Marthie.

I swallow harshly and grab onto his shoulder before standing up and walking off. I rub the bottom half of my face and find the shovel that we found at some place. I find a place to begin digging a ditch to bury him. The ground is hard.

We can't even bury Meredith because she was devoured by the crowd. I make another dent in the soil, putting more exertion into it. We didn't even bother to bury Cate. Saying her name leaves a vile taste in my mouth. I wouldn't let us bury her. She's better off turning into one of those things. She doesn't deserve my mercy. I have only just begun, yet I'm already feeling excessive sweat forming on my forehead.

The sound of the shovel breaking dirt distracts me from hearing the creature sneak up on me until he's right behind me. Without hesitation, I manage to whip around and swing the shovel in its direction with an angry shout. I slice the head in half. Another one makes its appearance from behind a tree, snarling in my direction. I swing the shovel again. It gets stuck mid-chop. Another one comes from the other direction, so I pull the axe out and swing it when it gets close enough. Both weapons stuck, I struggle trying to get them out another one walks straight up to me. "Shit." No weapon available, I kick it backward, it falling onto a branch. I just let go of the shovel to use all my strength to pull the axe out. I finally slice the third one's head in half. I retrieve the shovel and put the axe back on my beltloop after flinging the blood off it.

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