The Soulmate System

32. A Theme of Moving Forwards

"I can't go back to work."

Bryce's gaze returned to Dylan sitting at the kitchen counter, fidgeting over the remains of his coffee. Morning light flooded through the windows, the sky specked with grey clouds and the possibility of snowfall in the air. "What?" He chuckled for a moment before moving away from the door. "Dylan, go get dressed. We need to leave. Like, now."

"Bryce, I can't go back," he whispered, his being remaining unmoved.

"Dylan, this isn't funny. We need to go now."

Finally, Dylan met Bryce's gaze. "No."

It was the way Dylan looked at his Soulmate that made Bryce take note. There was vulnerability, fear and realisation, even, behind the brown eyes Bryce was in love with. So he paused, dropping his computer bag to the floor and closed the space between the two. "What's wrong?" he asked.

He cringed slightly at Bryce's question, fearing what he would think of Dylan for a moment. But mustering as much quiet confidence he could, he whispered, "I, uh, I feel like my work is, worthless and I...I just need to change jobs now."

Bryce sat down on the counter, ignoring the empty seat beside Dylan. "Is this because of what your Aunt Bee said at the reunion? That was months ago, and she didn't know what she was talking about."

Dylan shook his head. "No, no. She was right; I don't want to...peter away my life doing something as stupid as graphic communication design. It's not even something I like."

"I'm not a fan of design, either, but we gotta to do what w – "

Dylan's fingers receded into his palms. "No, no! You–you don't get it! You're fucking Head Artistic Designer, and I'm still just...web-coding for unknown companies Corporate approved of." Dylan's eyes dropped back to the black countertop before continuing, "Bryce, when I left for university, I believed I was going to...to be this, amazing person who never looked back on his mistakes."

"You also believed you'd never meet your Soulmate," Bryce pointed out, which was followed up almost immediately with Dylan's death stare.

But his tone had softened after that. "I...I believed I was going to do things. Rip apart new novels and compare them to the classics. Criticize new authors who thought they were hot shit when their books were actually unreadable. Promote books that made you think and ask questions. Use words like 'symbolism' and 'theme' seriously, and not ironically." Dylan sighed again. "I just, I can't go back and pretend like my work is meaningful when it isn't. I've wasted enough of my life ignoring and pretending that things aren't there." Dylan's eyes looked slowly up at Bryce's, who was watching him intently.

"I understand, Dylan," Bryce whispered.

"Do you?" he whispered back, eyes dropping again. "You studied something that you still liked. You ended up – "

"Dylan." Bryce slipped off the counter and stood beside him. "I get it. This is just something you have to do, and I get that." Placing his hand down on Dylan's shoulder, he finished, "I'll tell them you're not coming into work today, okay? Do you want to try and figure out something?" Dylan nodded. "And if you can't find anything?"

Dylan turned his head to speak, but found the words he'd wanted to say absent. "Then I'll come back to work," was the only answer he could find.

"That shouldn't be your backup plan," Bryce retorted gently. "I want – no, I need to see you happy. And if you need help, just let me know, okay?"

Dylan nodded. "I'm glad that you – "

"So it isn't because you don't want that spicy office romance anymore?" Bryce teased.