Tomorrow's Blues

32. Mornings

When I woke the next morning, for a moment I forgot what had happened. I forgot that we were staying in a hotel, that I wasn't in my own bed. For a second I wondered why I felt so unbelievably happy, and then a warm weight shifted next to me and I remembered.

I slowly forced my eyes open and squinted at the light blazing in through the window. Neither of us had closed the curtains last night and now I felt like I was being blinded. When my vision adjusted to the brightness of the room, I looked over at Joseph. He was still sleeping. For a while I just watched him, admiring him, taking in all of his features. His lips were parted, one wavy bit of hair hanging over his forehead. The sheets were tangled around us, and our clothes were somewhere on the floor. I brought my hand up and gently brushed his cheek with a finger, as if wanting to make sure he was real. It didn't feel real. I never thought this would happen, but here we were.

When Joseph didn't wake at my touch, I gently pushed the hair back from his forehead. He began to stir, a quiet groan escaping him. One blue eye cracked open, and then the other, and he smiled. "Hey."

"Hi," I murmured, my hand still lightly grazing his cheek.

"How long have you been staring at me?" Joseph said, shifting closer to me.

"Not long enough for it to be creepy," I said with a half-smile. "I just wanted to look at you because... well, because I can."

He lifted a hand and brushed a strand of hair from my face. "What, because you never used to stare at me before?"

I rubbed my face and scowled. "I didn't stare at you that much."

"Sure, Lily." Joseph gave me a look.

My scowl gave way to a smile and I lightly hit his shoulder before rolling over onto my back, the sheets barely covering me. "Ugh. My head hurts."

"Well, I feel fresh," he said. "But I didn't do about ten shots of tequila last night."

"It was not ten," I protested, twisting to look at him. "But I'm not sure of the actual total." I groaned. "And this sunlight is not helping."

"Yeah, well, guess we forgot to close the curtains last night. I was kinda distracted."

I blushed but laughed. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Mm." Joseph lifted my hand with his and intertwined our fingers together. It was such a simple gesture, but it still gave me butterflies, even after last night. I thought maybe my reaction to Joseph's light touches would have calmed down a little, but they hadn't.

My happy bubble was starting to dissipate a little as my mind cleared. Reality was starting to set in, and my smile faded slightly.

"Lily?" I glanced at Joseph to see him looking at me with furrowed eyebrows. "What are you thinking about?"

Stupid Joseph being so observant. Well, not stupid Joseph, he was amazing, really. "Um, Alice."

"Oh. Great. You're thinking about my sister right now."

I poked his shoulder with my free hand. "Shut up. I was just thinking..." I bit my lip. "Well, she can't know."

Joseph didn't answer for a moment. "No. She can't."

"So no one else should know, either," I said decidedly.

"Probably not." Joseph traced light circles on the back of my hand with his thumb. "Does that bother you?"

I thought about it. "No." And it didn't. "Besides, I've never been rebellious in my life, so I think sneaking around will be kinda fun."

He gave an exasperated roll of his eyes. "Wow. You should really live on the edge a little more."