How Are You, Really? (Drarry)

Chapter Twenty-Five: Neville's Confession

"You don't really need the help, do you?"

The question startled Draco. Looking up, he met Neville's eyes. "No, not really." He set aside his Herbology textbook.

Neville stopped pruning the bush before him. "Then, why are you here? Why did you ask me to tutor you?"

Draco considered the man. He would never have believed this was the same boy who had stuttered and tripped his way through school, who had always been the perfect target besides Harry. He had changed, grown into a confident man his grandmother was proud of.

"Because I didn't know how else to get close to you, to be completely honest."

Neville blinked, his eyes wide. "Why would you want to get close to me?"

Draco smirked. "Because I have a big whopping crush on you, Neville." He bit his lip to keep from laughing at the expression of horror on the other man's face. "I'm just joking. You can't apologize to someone who won't speak to you. At least, not well."

Neville frowned. "But you apologized ages ago. Why do we still meet?"

Draco stared at the man as if he was daft. "Because I enjoy your company. And as good as my grade is in Herbology, yours is still better."

"You enjoy my company?" Neville sat down next to Draco. "Why?"

Draco seriously considered the question. "Because," he began slowly, "You're passionate about what you love, which is refreshing. And you're an excellent teacher, better than some of the ones here now. But most importantly, you've forgiven me and treated me not as a DeathEater but as an equal. I can't say that about everyone. You also are comfortable with silence and don't feel the need to make aimless chatter. You are a good companion, and I enjoy your company."

Neville stared slack-jawed at Draco. He opened and closed his mouth a few times before stuttering, "If you wanted to be friends, all you had to do was ask."

Draco felt a real smile pull at his lips. "Friends then?"

Neville reached out his hand to clasp Draco's. "Friends."

They went back to what they were doing until Neville broke the silence. "Seeing as we're friends now, I have a question."

"Shoot, " Draco said.

"How long have you loved Harry?"

Draco choked on the very air he was trying to breathe. "What?"

Neville looked at Draco with interest. "So it's true then. I didn't believe Luna when she told me."

Draco silently cursed his friend under his breath. They had never talked about it, but Luna was one of the most perceptive people he'd ever met, hidden behind her airy disposition.

"Don't worry; I won't tell him. That's not my business. But how long has it been?"

Draco tried to smirk, but it came out more of a grimace. "I think from the moment I met him in the robe shop before our first year. Everything since then has just been me denying what I felt."

Neville whistled. "That's a long time, Draco."

"I know, " he said miserably. "Almost half my life, actually."

"You ever going to tell him?"

Draco was stunned by the question. "Of course not!"

"Why?"

"Because Harry has only recently forgiven me. Because we have a tentative friendship I value and don't want to destroy. Because, because-"

"You're afraid he won't love you back."

"Of course, he won't! He's Harry fucking Potter, and I'm just some Death Eater who got people killed!" Draco spat out. Didn't Neville understand?

Neville was quiet for several minutes, pruning his plant with deft movements and a furrowed brow.

"I don't think you give Harry enough credit."

Draco stayed silent.

"You don't see the way he looks at you. He cares about you."

"Of course he does, " Draco spat. "He's the Golden Boy; he cares about everyone."

Neville shook his head. "He cares differently for you. Why do you think Ron's so upset? On some level, he knows this is different."

Draco's chest filled with hope for a split second before he crushed it down. "Even if he did, and he doesn't, we could never make it work."

It was Neville's turn to smirk. "Bet you said that about being friends, too."

Draco stared at the bush Neville had been clipping. It stared back at him menacingly. "I can't tell him, Neville. I can't bare my heart to him like that and have it be crushed in one blow. This kind of pain I can live with. I wouldn't survive it if he turned me down or worse, ended our friendship."

Neville stared at him sadly. "I think you're making a mistake by not at least trying. But it's your decision."

"Enough about me, " Draco muttered. "What about you? Have anyone you're interested in?"

Neville blushed to the roots of his hair. "Don't laugh,"

Draco nodded in encouragement. "I won't."

"IkindahaveathingforBlaise."

It took a second for Draco to process what he'd said. "No way. Really?"

Neville nodded. "But he doesn't know I exist."

It was Draco's turn to nod. After thinking for a moment, he said, "Why don't you eat lunch with us sometime? I can introduce you officially."

Neville stared at him in shock. "Can I?"

"Of course. We're friends."

Neville smiled tentatively. "Okay."

The plant next to them gave a high pitched shriek. "Whoops, better get back to what I was doing." Neville went back to pruning, and Draco turned back to his book, not seeing a word on the page. Neville's advice was still ringing in his ears.