Toxic Desire

chapter one

I'm consumed in an eternal silence where the only sound my ears peek up is the sound of silence, my body feels the hands of darkness teasing it and the smell of my own blood is the only scent I can make detect

The days blend into weeks or maybe it's just been a few hours or minutes since I've been trapped in this abyss, you know what they say about time it's a cruel joke and yet it finds ways to humor me.

I think I'm alive or maybe not maybe I'm a ghost I'm dead but I just don't know I feel alive tho I could still smell my blood so maybe that's a sign that im not a ghost, I feel uncomfortable in my position but the chains on my hands and legs refrain me from moving much the least I can do is just hear as my blood drips down

My eyes wouldn't open I'm not really opposing this the less my eyes take the less my demons know , i was stuck listening to the continuous loop of my blood "maybe I'll bleed out and die who knows " those were my thoughts until I heard the metallic door open I could see faintly rays of light from my eyes but I couldn't open it, I wouldn't dare no one would dare come here unless  him and I wasn't going to risk fading off the face of the world in peace.

But a sharp sting that traveled along my cheek manages to pry my eyes open immediately, I could see the cold blue eyes that constantly haunted my dreams staring back down at me with a frown on his face my face involuntarily wanted to make out a smile but I remember his punishment and it disappears immediately .

"We have visitors coming , Rosa" he said the last word with so much hatred and disgust you wouldn't  be able to tell from first glance I was his daughter.

"You need to look presentable , wear something appropriate and don't embarrass me " he says 

  He wanted me to wear something long,something that would over up the scars and burns he had inflicted on me I could see the threat in his word and I don't want to find out what would happen if I disobeyed him this time.
Maybe some broken ribs or maybe I'll be given to his friends whatever it was I didn't want to find out .

I wasn't left to think about that as he made his way outside sparing me a cold glance.

My body ached and I wasn't talking about the physical pain I was exhausted deep in my heart and sound I could feel the exhaustion but I could also feel the pain and loneliness .

Every breath was a struggle to take every movement felt like a sharp stab of pain , tears pricked up at the corners of my eyes but I wouldn't let them fall, crying was a weakness and so was showing any emotions my father had mark that as an imprint in my head the first time he locked me in the dark.

Pain Is just the sign that you're alive I remember reading a particular poem but how do I tell the poet that Im not alive I'm just not dead there's a difference after taking some painful stairs and paths I make it to my door step.

Upon entering the room I feel nothing I feel blank I take my time to remove the remain steal of cloth that remained on me carefully making sure that i didn't make any contact with a wound, I make my way to the bathroom and soak myself in a bath the hot water dissolves my skin like salt but I don't feel pain I don't feel anything I just feel breaths, I hear my breaths and the occasional thumping of my heart but except from that nothing else.

Sighing I make my way out of the bath and into my closet I pick a long blue dress that reaches the ground above my kneel and some nude heels go pair with it , I feel  automatic I could see and feel what I was yet my brain had no ties with my body at the same time, I brush my hair without the aid of a dresser, then make my way down stairs.

As I approach my fathers office voices grew louder , I felt like an outsider but it wasn't a decision of mine it was my fate since birth

As I entered my father's office, I saw him sitting behind his desk, his cold blue eyes fixed on me. He was a man in his late forties, with a chiseled jawline and a menacing presence. He was flanked by two men I had never seen before, their faces expressionless.

"Rosa, these are our guests," he said, his voice dripping with malice. "They're here to discuss a business proposition."

I nodded, my heart racing with anticipation. I knew that my father's business dealings were always shady, and I feared for my safety.

"Hello, Rosa," one of the men said, his voice low and menacing. "We've heard a lot about you."

I forced a smile, trying to hide my fear "Hello," I replied, my voice barely above a whisper.

My father gestured to a chair in front of his desk. "Sit down, Rosa. We have a lot to discuss."

I hesitated, my instincts screaming at me to run away. But I knew that I couldn't escape my father's wrath. I sat down, my eyes fixed on the men, wondering what they wanted from me

The devil's in the details but so am I, trapped in this hell of my own thoughts.

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