Daddy's Precious Little Girl

New Beginnings

 After helping her down off the bed we headed out of the nurse's office. I thank Anthony for allowing us to use his space. I want to hold her hand but I don't. I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. The bell rings signaling the end of the first period. She startles and reaches for my hand. I keep my hold on her hand light but her grip is anything but. When the hallway starts to fill she shuffles closer to me. Her breathing picks up and I can tell she is on the cusp of another panic attack. Squeezing her hand gently I ask her if it is okay for me to pick her up. Instead of answering verbally she raises her hands up to me. Quickly I pick her up and she buries her head into chest. Memories of Duncan leaning into me for support assault me, but I manage to push those feelings down.

When we reach Mr. Delas's classroom I try to set her back down in the Little's area but her grip around my neck strengthens. "It's okay sweet girl, we are back in class." I tell her hoping she will let go so I can take my seat. Instead of letting go she just holds tighter. Gently rubbing her back I try to coax her to lean back and look around. When she finally does loosen up to look around her eyes grow wide and she shrinks back into the comfort of my arms. Looking around I notice that all eyes are on us. As the bell rings for the start of class, I decide not to push her into anything and just take her back to my seat. Glancing next to me I notice Mr. Delas placing a booster seat on the desk chair next to me. When I try to place her into the seat she whimpers slightly and my instincts flare.

Whispering words of reassurance I motion for Mr. Delas to start class. As he starts teaching the tension in Ashlynn's little body begins to lessen. She relaxes against me and as much as I wish to hold her I know it is encouraged for Littles to participate in this period. I wait until Mr. Delas asks the Bigs to retrieve a booster seat and a Little. Then I once again try to coax Ashlynn into the booster seat next to me. She looks around wearily but seeing others placing the Littles into seats next to theirs Ashlynn allows me to do the same. She slipped her thumb into her mouth and I made a mental note to get her a pacifier. As Mr. Delas resumes class our attention is drawn to him.

Three hours later we are standing outside the Little's Sanctuary, also known as the daycare. Ashlynn has been a dream, even if she is rather clingy. I was planning on just taking her to my afternoon classes but during lunch Lana sat with us. She asks Ashlynn if she was excited to go to the Sanctuary after lunch to paint and Ashlynn's whole demeanor changed. She excitedly clapped her hands and began to talk all about what she wanted to paint. Watching her excitedly telling Lana about painting I felt myself wanting to find out everything that makes this girl happy. I let go of Ashlynn's hand inside of the daycare. "Go on Little one. Go play, I will be back at the end of the day to walk you back to your dorm okay?" I'm confused when she doesn't go running off to the art area. "What's wrong Little one?" I ask her. "Ethan, stay?" she asks in a small voice and I know immediately that she is in Little space. "No, Precious girl, I have to go to work while you go paint. Unlike all the other Doms in school I have already completed all my classes from my time with Duncan. Mostly I fill in when teachers have to step out of their classrooms. I have two classes to teach today, in-between those classes I am on call for any teachers that have to step out of their room for any reason.

Ashlynn looks around the room sadly but she doesn't leave my side. "Go on Sweet Girl, I will be back soon." She steps even closer to me and I finally register that she is nervous about me leaving her. That shouldn't please me as much as it does, but over the course of the day I realized how much I miss taking care of someone. As much as I want to take her to my next class I know that eventually we are going to separated. Also I want to take this time to let her know that when I say I will come back I mean it.

"How about this Little one, I will come back after my first afternoon class and check on you. If you want to come with me at that time I will bring with me for the rest of afternoon classes. Sound okay to you?" Before she could answer, one of the daycare teachers have made their way over to us. "Hi there, Little one. My name is Miss Emily. Would you like to come play with me and some of our friends?" She asks, holding out her hand to her. Ashlynn looks at me, I nod letting her know it is okay and Ashlynn reluctantly takes the teacher's hand.

I inform the head teacher of my plan to check on Ashlynn at the end of next period and she agrees. Walking away leaves a weird feeling in my gut. I don't want to leave her. She wasn't feeling confident about this class. I know that she is in good hands. Every teacher in the daycare is a caregiver, this room is off limits to every other classification. Only Littles and Caregivers. So she should be fine, but this strange feeling stays with me growing stronger the further I walk away from her. I have to trust that she is okay, after this class I will be back. Just one hour.