Underdawgs

Chapter 19

I arrive at Lily's house. It's a nice night, warm but not humid. I ring the doorbell and Lily answers.

      'Hey.' She smiles, taking my hand in hers. 'Come on in.'

      She leads me into the dining room. The lights have been turned down and Paul Kelly is playing on the stereo.

      Lily is wearing a short, tight T-shirt that cuts off just bellow her belly button and skin tight black jeans. She looks so strong, so confident and stable. She's the only person I can rely on, the only thing that makes sense to me.

      'How are you this fine evening?' she asks with a cheeky smile.

      'I'm a little rattled, actually,' I admit.

      Her smile fades. 'What's wrong?' she asks, concerned.

      'It's Kev and the others,' I tell her. 'There all getting crazy. They tracked down the guys who stabbed DJ and they're all riled up and set to have it out with them ...' 

        'Really?' Lily says. 'Well, you seem seriously stressed out. Let me relax you.' She saunters over and kisses me playfully. 'Tonight is about you and me. You can play all that tough guy bullshit later ...'

      'It's not like that,' I insist. 'I mean, Lily, they're talking about seriously hurting this kid and his mates.'

      Lily sighs, frustrated.

      'I really don't know what to do,' I say, defeated.

      'Well, what choices do you have?' she asks. 'You can fight these guys and get revenge for DJ, or you can man up and be bigger then that. You've got no future with those guys.' 

      'They've been like my brothers for so long.'

      'Fuck that,' Lily protests. 'You know they don't have a future, you've said it yourself.'

      'I know, Lily, but I can't just ...'

      'They're going to end up in prison, dead, or worse. I know that, you know that, hell, even they probably know that.'

      'Lily, no ...'

      'You have to make a serious decision, Jase. You either stay friends with them and watch as each one of them either gets themselves killed or gets picked up by the cops and drags you down with them.'

       'Or?'

      'Or you think about your own life and who you choose to be, and just remember your mates for who they were and not what they're becoming.'

      As much as I don't want to hear it, I know Lily is right. If I show up to the fight, there will be no middle ground. I'll end up getting hurt, or hurting someone else. 'Okay,' I say. 'Let's just forget about all that stuff for now. Tonight's about you and me, right? So let's just have fun.'

      Lily grins, kissing me on the lips. 'I was wondering when you were going to say that.'

      We begin the night by cooking dinner, which quickly turns into us getting pissed and cooking dinner, as Lily raids the fridge for every alcoholic beverage she can get her hands on. Lily switches the music over to some new rap track she's become obsessed with while I go about trying to find all the ingredients for our lasagna in between swigs of wine. We mess about, joking and wrestling, getting drunker and drunker as the night progresses. Lily takes over the cooking from me, and I flick the stereo to Disclosure and dance around the room with my shirt off. We're both hyper, happy to finally have a chance to spend time alone together. Tonight I don't have to worry about my problems, I don't have to make hard decisions or feel anger, guilt or fear. Tonight I can just be with Lily.