alone || yangyang

✂2

Yangyang could only stare at Ten's side of the room with shaky hands. He could smell the faint relaxing scent of clary sage from Ten's favorite scented candles grow stronger as he took small steps towards the desk.

The late night talks about the future, the tears shed and advice given, the pure moments of comfortable silence between them. He missed them so much. He missed his older brother figure.

He missed Ten but couldn't do anything about it. He thought he could handle it, but it just made him crave for the presence of his quirky friend.

"Calm down. You can do this." Yangyang encouraged, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his hoodie. His family had requested if they could hand over Ten's belongings for them to bring back to Thailand. 

He could have easily passed it to someone who was more stable than him, but he knew he would be able to get some kind of clue from doing this.

"What do you think?" Ten asked, a smug look on his face. "This is the first thing I bought with the money I saved up. I can finally upgrade my commissions!" 

"How much did this cost?" Yangyang gawked. He eyed the newest additions and upgrades to Ten's little art corner.

"My soul." Ten joked, sitting down on the new office chair. "Strike a pose. Let me draw you as my first ever piece with the new equipment."

"I still have the file with me." Yangyang mumbled, carefully packing the equipment into a box. He set the first box aside and grabbed another to pack his books. 

"Yangyang." Ten suddenly called, looking up from his book. 

Yangyang paused his game and sighed. "I swear if you just called me to say hi again I will-"

"What do you think happens when you die?"

"Easy!" He exclaimed with a huff. He looked Ten dead in the eye, making the latter curious to what he thinks. "You die." 

"I'm being serious you know." Ten mumbled, throwing a pillow at him. Yangyang caught it with ease and hugged it before rolling over onto his back. 

"Well either it goes all black and we return to the earth, or we go to where we're fated to go depending on the religion. I mean, that's what I think."  He shared, not really putting much thought into it. "I mean, we gotta die first to know, right? Why are you having an existential crisis this early in the night?" 

"Nothing. I just... had a random thought."

"Have you found your answer yet?" Yangyang softly asked, placing the last book in. A chill goes down his spine as he felt a sudden presence behind him. He hesitantly looked back and was relieved to see his friend. "Oh, Hendery. Did you need something?"

"You said that we were going to go biking by Han river at like 4 but it looks like you're busy." Hendery reminded. "I've been waiting in the living room."

"Oh shit. I'm sorry." Yangyang apologized. He looked at the time and saw it was nearly five. "I was too caught up in this and lost track of time."

"I can help you to make it faster." Hendery offered, rolling up the sleeves of his hoodie. "What should I do?"

"It's alright. I can handle it alone. I'm nearly done." Yangyang assured. 

"Look at yourself. You look so drained." Hendery said, pointing at the mirror on the closet. 

Yangyang looked at his gaunt appearance. Bags formed heavily on the flesh beneath his eyes from the lack of sleep, his face drained of color and caving in slightly in his cheeks, chapped lips, red and puffy eyes, and his hair was a mess.

He looked like the life was sucked out of him. 

"Let me help, please?" Hendery pleaded. 

"There's another box over there for the things at his desk." Yangyang sighed, giving in. "If there's something you're not sure is his leave them on the table. I'll arrange them."

Hendery nodded and quickly got to work. "Let's grab a bite after this. I heard there's a good frozen yogurt parlor that recently opened and we can unwind there." 

"Sure. My treat since I kept you waiting." Yangyang insisted. He glanced one more time at Hendery before putting his focus on neatly arranging Ten's clothes into a box.

"Matching sweaters? But why?" Yangyang asked.

"If you don't like it I can always give it to Sicheng-"

"Slow down there, I didn't say anything about not wanting it. I was just asking why." The younger interjected. He hugged the black sweater close to him, preventing Ten from grabbing it.

"I think it's cool. People won't really notice our token of friendship unless they look close enough. I mean, a black sweater is like a basic piece we can style." Ten explained. 

"Thank you for this."

"Now hurry and put that on so I have something to show off with on Instagram."  Ten ushered him into their shared bathroom before he could speak.

"Yangyang?"

Yangyang looked up from the sweater in his hands and towards Hendery. He quickly folded it and placed it in the box. "Sorry, I was spacing out. What was that?" 

"I spilled some weird ink on me but I finished up clearing out his desk." Hendery let out a sheepish chuckle as he showed his ruined clothes. 

"Go wash up, I'll just move the boxes out." Yangyang instructed, opening the bathroom door for his friend. Once Hendery was out, Yangyang began stacking the boxes. He spotted a dark green cover at the corner of his eye. He picked up the book and examined it.

It was Ten's journal. 

"I'm sorry, but I need answers."

Yangyang flipped through the pages, skimming through the entries. There was nothing out of the ordinary in it. Only a couple of pages were ripped out, probably from Ten not being satisfied with the aesthetic of the page.

The last page that was filled nearly made his heart stop. Contrasting the soft and aesthetic entries, the spread was just of a drawing of a creepy looking... bunny? The more he looked at it the more familiar it looked.

"Yangyang! Let's go while Sicheng is willing to drive us around!" Hendery called from the living room. 

"Coming!" Yangyang hollered, taking a quick picture of the drawing. He placed the journal in its respective box before carrying it out with the rest. 

A/N 

I think I just put too many hints in here HAHAHAHAHHA

but sad hours as Yangyang remembers Ten